the big one

[Nochowderforyou]

Mix LSD with magic mushrooms.

I did that only once in my life, and the walls were breathing. In, out, like a beating chest, with light sounds of breathing. Every lit smoke I saw had a bright orange tracer that went on for ft' at a time. I was fucked, in another world. The floor was at eye level as I was sitting in my chair. I heard sizzling bacon but there was no one in my kitchen. And when I misplaced something, it would turn up hours later, in the same place I had put it, and a place I had chekced a thousand times before.

I remeber that trip like it was yersterday. Mix the 2, you won't be sorry.

Nochowderforyou Reviewed by Nochowderforyou on 03-11-2006. the big one ive decided im finished im done with it all this is just a struggle a long assed one its total bullshit ive come round to idea that im actualy goin to try and blow my brain off the scale. im talking the biggest drug binge ever. ive got 5 months 2 save up every peice of money i got and im gonna buy all the drugs i can lay my mitts on. so far weed - easy acid - on its way from bournmouth cocaine- down the road flat n0. 5 mdma - got 20 mitsibushi;'s one the way from vauxhall Rating: 5

[Trichocereus Panza]

you know a good place to read up on this iboga/ibogaine, i would look it up myself but i dont trust just anything google spews out at me

http://www.erowid.org/chemicals/ibogaine/ibogaine.shtml

Ibogaine is the extract form of the traditional African plant Iboga.

I haven't read much myself, but erowid is always the first place I check, they are pretty reliable.

[dark0ne]

man, i have been there. My feance dumped me and lost our kid do to a crack addiction i wasn't aware of. So i locked myself in my room and sniffed 2 60$ bags of heroin, after i ate a whole 80 oxicotin. after laying on the floor waiting to die for what seamed like an eternaty. I thought about my mother's face crying when she found out how i died. i thought about my friends and how they would react. so i pulled myself off the floor, and after a few hot coffies i sat down and evaluated my situation. I helped myself get off dope (well weed helped to). i kicked the worst drug to be addicted to, by myself. Don't live life in other people's eyes. live it through your own. There is a hell of alot of good shit still left on this planet, you just need a vacation. away from drugs and work and people. just you. then you will see.

[chisme]

chisme, I think you are really scaring some of us bro. I'm glad you realize you don't really want to kill yourself; this probably is not the place for you to talk about serious shit as you can see from some of these other posts.

I can't believe people are actually giving recommendations on how to OD and making jokes, how about some real sympathy people. I can't even tell when they're joking or not. It just makes me scared and sad when we're dealing with real human lives and someone's deep personal feelings and we see people responding like this.

I can see you're embarrassed about whatever it is, but maybe it isn't as bad as you think. Fuck dude, do you really think we're judging you? I'm not anyway. Just be calm and think things over, maybe save your money for the medical attention you seem to need/want rather than drugs (although perhaps a GOOD strong experience or two can give you some clarity and perspective to think things through better...)

Have you ever heard of Iboga/Ibogaine? People have used this strong psychedelic to cure themselves of all kinds of unwanted addictions, by allowing them to look back on their lives objectively and calmly. It's possible to see what you've done wrong in the past without judging yourself or thinking it's too late to change. It sounds like you mostly just need a clean slate, THEN you can deal with your problems. So maybe a therapeutic voyage IS in order, just make sure you come back from it, and hopefully you'll re-emerge in better health. okay?

I don't know your situation so this may be all wrong but I hope it works out better than you think.

i dont know what to thin anymore everytime i feel i might be able to get on with it and move on onto something better and the next thing is allways hiding around the corner to smack u bang in the face when you think things are finally looking up its just bollox why doesnt anything good happen anymore? im in a hole and everytime i manage to climb halfway out the gravedigger nammed life piles more dirt down on top of me. it just got worse when i woke up i received a letter form my ex-company saying they wanna claim back £1300 they lent me for a laptop...its like fuckinging hell u just fired me and took all my wages how do u expect me to pay £1300? i got 7 days now ive gotts go citizens advice ......you see what i mean everyday i wake up and theres nothing but shit waiting to ruin another day . why dont i ever get good news? this past year has been to shit .. my mothers liver cancer had to get re-examimed because the docter see';s sumthing weird and if uvb ever heard those words you know wierd can mean so bad ive only had 2 job interviews since i got fired 3 weeks ago and they laughed at me because i was so young looking. i even used my last £10 to get the to the interview and when i arrived they said i was too young even thou they called me from my cv on the net saying my age...how fucked is that? i dunno what to do now i can only hope the citizens advice burea can help me out if not.....well i dunno this is my whole question when is too much too much?

[chisme]

man, i have been there. My feance dumped me and lost our kid do to a crack addiction i wasn't aware of. So i locked myself in my room and sniffed 2 60$ bags of heroin, after i ate a whole 80 oxicotin. after laying on the floor waiting to die for what seamed like an eternaty. I thought about my mother's face crying when she found out how i died. i thought about my friends and how they would react. so i pulled myself off the floor, and after a few hot coffies i sat down and evaluated my situation. I helped myself get off dope (well weed helped to). i kicked the worst drug to be addicted to, by myself. Don't live life in other people's eyes. live it through your own. There is a hell of alot of good shit still left on this planet, you just need a vacation. away from drugs and work and people. just you. then you will see.

thats it everytime it gets to that point all i can think of is my mum and then i feel pathetic because i know its the loser way out the fools escape. but then it remind me of why im doin it and it makes me feel worse because i never thought it would be like this ...i dunno i dont wanna be a fucking loser but i need to get out.

Don't live life in other people's eyes. live it through your own. There is a hell of alot of good shit still left on this planet, you just need a vacation. away from drugs and work and people. just you. then you will see.

thats the only thing that has kept me goin for a long time now but its not working no more

[chisme]

chisme, I think you are really scaring some of us bro. I'm glad you realize you don't really want to kill yourself; this probably is not the place for you to talk about serious shit as you can see from some of these other posts.

I can't believe people are actually giving recommendations on how to OD and making jokes, how about some real sympathy people. I can't even tell when they're joking or not. It just makes me scared and sad when we're dealing with real human lives and someone's deep personal feelings and we see people responding like this.

I can see you're embarrassed about whatever it is, but maybe it isn't as bad as you think. Fuck dude, do you really think we're judging you? I'm not anyway. Just be calm and think things over, maybe save your money for the medical attention you seem to need/want rather than drugs (although perhaps a GOOD strong experience or two can give you some clarity and perspective to think things through better...)

Have you ever heard of Iboga/Ibogaine? People have used this strong psychedelic to cure themselves of all kinds of unwanted addictions, by allowing them to look back on their lives objectively and calmly. It's possible to see what you've done wrong in the past without judging yourself or thinking it's too late to change. It sounds like you mostly just need a clean slate, THEN you can deal with your problems. So maybe a therapeutic voyage IS in order, just make sure you come back from it, and hopefully you'll re-emerge in better health. okay?

I don't know your situation so this may be all wrong but I hope it works out better than you think.

thank you for notflaming i geuss i just find it easier to say this stuff online because i havent gotta look at you guys in the face and i can fire it out better then i will ever beable to say face to face . i cant do that where im from im scared real scared because im falling down on my own and no ones putting a hand out. no one cares these days if youve got a problems your alone with it and if its too big for me to sort on my own im fucked. and now even after years of warnings i alowed myself to go down and little road that now im regretting i didnt listen im not a druggy or alcholic but thats what i mean epople just dont understand there are other things that are worse to live with.

[Trichocereus Panza]

thank you for notflaming i geuss i just find it easier to say this stuff online because i havent gotta look at you guys in the face and i can fire it out better then i will ever beable to say face to face . i cant do that where im from im scared real scared because im falling down on my own and no ones putting a hand out. no one cares these days if youve got a problems your alone with it and if its too big for me to sort on my own im fucked. and now even after years of warnings i alowed myself to go down and little road that now im regretting i didnt listen im not a druggy or alcholic but thats what i mean epople just dont understand there are other things that are worse to live with.

man i didn't think you were an addict or anything, in fact i was pretty sure that wasn't the problem... you are right that we cant really understand though, like i can't step into your life and live it for a day or anything.

But what you say about "no one's putting a hand out"... life isn't always like that, it's not true that no one cares these days, I fucking care I just wish there was more any of us could do. Thanks for talking about it though man, cause you need to hear other people's perspectives on things. You also need to find someone to talk to face to face who will be kind and understanding, I think when you're embarrassed it's harder to believe that people will truly care. I think you know none of your problems right now will last forever, I mean I myself feel like life is too much to handle all the time, it's just a difficult time of life for me, but eventually if you just keep going forward things DO get better. And the more positive attitude you manage to have NOW, the easier it will be to get through the whole thing.

As much as our problems now are worse, when we get suicidal we're still in some ways just like those poor shy teenagers who kill themselves b/c they think social life in high school means everything. Please don't think that a temporary problem means everything.

[BUZz UK]

chisme, you seem a safe geezer mate, don't be too rash about things...maybe telling us what's goin down would help, i don't think anyone here would judge you..i mean, fuck, we've had people asking if you can smoke insence ffs...we all have times where it goes wrong..i was fucked up for a while..chronically depressed, dropped outta school... i didn't wanna live, it scared the shit outta me, but i thought fuck it, i'll just live life without boundries...live as a libertine..i mean that might not work for you..i don't know your circumstances, but i'm getting the impression it's medical, right?

[LOVElife]

When did this site turn into Suicide City? There is always someone wanting to top themselves or OD!

It's a Weed site, if I had never visited before I would think this was a site full of Down and outs who have let drugs take over their life!

There is a Fine Line between Using and Abusing! Sort it out Boys and Girls!

Peace

[chisme]

man i didn't think you were an addict or anything, in fact i was pretty sure that wasn't the problem... you are right that we cant really understand though, like i can't step into your life and live it for a day or anything.

But what you say about "no one's putting a hand out"... life isn't always like that, it's not true that no one cares these days, I fucking care I just wish there was more any of us could do. Thanks for talking about it though man, cause you need to hear other people's perspectives on things. You also need to find someone to talk to face to face who will be kind and understanding, I think when you're embarrassed it's harder to believe that people will truly care. I think you know none of your problems right now will last forever, I mean I myself feel like life is too much to handle all the time, it's just a difficult time of life for me, but eventually if you just keep going forward things DO get better. And the more positive attitude you manage to have NOW, the easier it will be to get through the whole thing.

As much as our problems now are worse, when we get suicidal we're still in some ways just like those poor shy teenagers who kill themselves b/c they think social life in high school means everything. Please don't think that a temporary problem means everything.

chisme, you seem a safe geezer mate, don't be too rash about things...maybe telling us what's goin down would help, i don't think anyone here would judge you..i mean, fuck, we've had people asking if you can smoke insence ffs...we all have times where it goes wrong..i was fucked up for a while..chronically depressed, dropped outta school... i didn't wanna live, it scared the shit outta me, but i thought fuck it, i'll just live life without boundries...live as a libertine..i mean that might not work for you..i don't know your circumstances, but i'm getting the impression it's medical, right?

Thank you both for not just jumping in and banging on about it... what u both said does help allot more then everyone thinks. its medical/cosmetic just thought ide been here nealy a year now so i geuss as well as can be expected through an internet message board i beleive ive come to know most of u your opinion has a slight wave on me.

When did this site turn into Suicide City? There is always someone wanting to top themselves or OD!

It's a Weed site, if I had never visited before I would think this was a site full of Down and outs who have let drugs take over their life!

There is a Fine Line between Using and Abusing! Sort it out Boys and Girls!

Peace

i smoke when i visit this site ..when i smoke it relaxes me...when i relaxe i tend to talk about thing im not normaly comfortable thinking or having a conversation with someoen about. geuss i just knew that i load this site into my browser and if i couldnt take the answered i just wouldnt had to have visited again....sorta mind security u know