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02-12-2006, 06:06 PM #13
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Your views on "mental" people.
I'm sorry but I have to post this. This is how to laugh with "mental" people:
One day while my family was visiting my mother's sister, my autistic cousin Dave and I decided to drive to the gas station to get a snack. After arriving, we tooled around in the snack aisle, taking our time to settle on the best deal possible. After a good while I had made my decision, so I asked Dave if he had found something yet.
No response. I took a quick stroll around to give Dave another minute.
I came back and asked again, "What's up, Dave. What are you thinking, man?"
He answered, "Can I get a big bag of Crum Bums?"
"What the hell are Crum Bums?" The laughter had arrived before schedule. Luckily I was able to supress it.
Dave pointed to a blue bag of Combos - cheesy crackers, basically - and repeated, "Crum Bums."
So I grabbed the giant bag of Combos - I mean Crum Bums, along with my snickers and paid the $3.15. Off we went to the car.
We pulled into Dave's place and I had eaten my Snickers on the way back. I began unbuckling, but Dave didn't move.
"Where are your Com - Crum Bums?"
Dave shrugged. I laughed.
I took a look around the bottom of Dave's seat and behind it. Nothing. Still buckled in, Dave leaned around and took a gander at the back seat. I proceeded to open the back door and scour the back half of the car - nothing.
Finally we declared it lost and Dave unbuckled and got out of the car while I gave the interior one last once-over from outside the driver's window.
When Dave stood up I saw them.
In a kind of cosmic justice, the Crum Bums had been exactly where we should have looked in the first place - under Dave's ass. There they sat, squished into the nook between the ass and lumbar cushions, all crushed to hell.
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