The whole fucken idea behind it is that it sounds better.

Merry Christmas sounds cool.

Happy Holidays sounds gay.

When I think of Christmas, I remember that movie from when I was younger, about Christmas (it had it in the title), when that little kid with black glasses and blond hair got his tongue stuck to a pole and shot himself in the eye with a B.B. gun.

I think of Happy Holidays, I think of Wal-Mart.

God or no God, Jesus Christ or no Jesus Christ, Christmas is a tradition.

Happy Hannukah.