Living Room Dementia

[ScarlettCrush]

Vladimir Nabokov

tell me more about this russian.

[ScarlettCrush]

and thank you guys for feeling me on this, I am not depressed about it or feeling dark and alone. Just something I noticed about myself, how I detach from situations and that I should probably not do it. lol

[Blowboy]

This was indeed a very enjoyable and (partially) recognazible post. I also can't seem to enjoy what others do, or show much interest for it. Their habits are so ridiculous. Some call it apathy, but I see it different, don't really know how to describe it,I just can't think of anything they could do or say that could really bother me. There aren't much ppl that have the same attitude, and it's always cool to find someone that does.

I always look ppl in the eyes; if you do it, it naturally gives you self-confidence,
because so many look away.
I say:Keep on contemplating life and what you see in it...

[Roadking]

tell me more about this russian.

I've read some of his excerpts and short stories. I had typed out an excerpt and filed it on my pc...but couldn't seem to find it. It was in regards to a certain type of dementia. I'll check some other files later when I get home to see if I can find it. The title of your thread brought it to mind. And in reading your post, it appears that you have a gift for writing.

[Roadking]

My apologies...it wasn't 'dementia,' but a 'mania.'

I don't mean to insinuate that the following excerpt relates to you personally. The title of your thread brought it to mind, is all.

You do write real good though.

Anyways...here's the excerpt...totally unrelated to this thread. Just some
good imagery. It's from his writing entitled "Signs and Symbols."
***********************************************

"Referential mania," Herman Brink had called it. In these very rare cases the patient imagines that everything happening around him is a veiled reference to his personality and existence. He excludes real people from the conspiracy-because he considers himself to be so much more intelligent than other men. Phenomenal nature shadows him wherever he goes. Clouds in the staring sky transmit to one another, by means of slow signs, incredibly detailed information regarding him. His inmost thoughts are discussed at nightfall, in manual alphabet, by darkly gesticulating trees. Pebbles or stains or sun flecks form patterns representing in some awful way messages which he must intercept. Everything is a cipher and of everything he is the theme. Some of the spies are detached observers, such as glass surfaces nd still pools; others, such as coats in store windows, are prejudiced witnesses, lynchers at heart; others again (running water, storms) are hysterical to the point of insanity, have a distorted opinion of him, and grotesquely misinterpret his actions. He must be always on his guard and devote every minute and module of life to the decoding of the undulation of things. The very air he exhales is indexed and filed away. If only the interest he provokes were limited to his immediate surroundings-but alas it is not! With distance the torrents of wild scandal increase in volume and volubility. The silhouettes of his blood corpuscles, magnified a million times, flit over vast plains; and still farther, great mountains of unbearable solidity and height sum up in therms of granite and groaning firs the ultimate truth of his being.

[ScarlettCrush]

I like it, thanks for posting.
and thanks very much for the compliment; every once in a while, I am inspired.

[bonsaiguy]

and thank you guys for feeling me on this, I am not depressed about it or feeling dark and alone. Just something I noticed about myself, how I detach from situations and that I should probably not do it. lol

Don't stop the occasional detachment Scarlett. It allows us to look at ourselves (and in some cases others) with a certain level of objectivity and accuracy that is just not there when totally involved. Sort of like the OBE thing without all of the spooky bullshit. Ever read Castenada? If you can get past all of his BS and all of the controversey regarding whether or not he made the whole thing up, there are some remarkable insights in to human nature in his writings. Just don't take off in to the Sonoran desert with a bag full of peyote buttons like some of those idiots did when his books were first published.

[vipper of vip]

I get through life by remembering two things (other than being caned):

1. Only worry about the things you can affect - if you didn't do something in the past then beating yourself up about it doesn't make any difference. Deciding how you can do it in the future doesn't
2. It doesn't matter what 99.9999999999999999999% of people think about you. It's only your nearest and dearest that matter and if they really care they will want to help you.