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  1.     
    #1
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    I've heard different theories.

    The poll is coming.

    Whoops, wrong button.


    Okay, forget it. Do you think he'll return as a person, other lifeform, spirit, inanimate object, or whatever else?
    beachguy in thongs Reviewed by beachguy in thongs on . Jesus' Return I've heard different theories. The poll is coming. Whoops, wrong button. Okay, forget it. Do you think he'll return as a person, other lifeform, spirit, inanimate object, or whatever else? Rating: 5

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  3.     
    #2
    Member

    Jesus' Return

    I don't reckon he'll come back at all. If anything it'll probably be the father coming back to take revenge like in that parable about the cityfull of peeps who scorned the prophets then killed the mans son.
    Didn't that story say vengeance would come. Never mind sea levels are arising everyone maybe we'll all drown first anyway. :thumbsup:

    trychs is feeling glum.

  4.     
    #3
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    Well, I guess it was just that. A parable.

    But, to Gnostics, Jesus Christ is a parable.

  5.     
    #4
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    a parable about a man who spread parables in attempt to save humanity; the moral of the parable?


    leave everyone the fuck alone, and do whatever the fuck it is you want to do, and just embrace the cause-and-effect of your actions.

  6.     
    #5
    Junior Member

    Jesus' Return

    I don't think he's coming back.. I think it's like one of those times when you want to ditch your little brother or somebody and you're all like "yeah man... wait right here, I'll be right back" and you leave them there.

  7.     
    #6
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    That's a cool explanation. It gives more credibility to the "Jesus was a Stoner" Theory.

  8.     
    #7
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    Jesus already came back in 2000, but it was in peurto rico so nobody noticed.

  9.     
    #8
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    i still think jesus is too pissed off at us, and wont come back untill he calms down, but alas, his temper is a direct RESULT of our mindset, not so much our actions.


    our ignorance and lack of faith hurts christ's feelings, and a metaphysical body is made up OF feelings. we continue to attack him even after the crucifixion.


    no, he wont come back unless a). he's not angry any more
    or b). he is going to annahilate all of us.

  10.     
    #9
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    I think he's pissed that we've been spelling his name wrong for 2,000 years.

    Geez'.

  11.     
    #10
    Senior Member

    Jesus' Return

    lmao SHHHHSHSHHHHHH!!!!


    it's funnier this way!

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