Me and a mate used to always go looking for garden gnomes to steal when we were fucked on pills after going clubbing. We got one, and it was quite a catch...but we felt guilty and took it back the next day.

Also, on pills, i went over from my mate's house to his neighbour's and stole a chicken, and took it in his bedroom. One of our mates is shit scared of birds, so he cowered in the corner and it flew at him flapping and it starting shitting everywhere so i had to take it back.