Caruso, what exactly makes you think that the whole world gives a shit? I don't think that public internet forums are a good place to seek pity, cuz lets face it, you're feeling a bit low, coming on here and announcing your problems, people like you lose track of perspective...you may think you wanting to kill yourself is a big deal, but believe me it's not. If, on that night, you'd just killed yourself, the world wouldn't have stopped for a whole day and mourned in pity...just like it doesn't when everyone else in the world has a problem they've gotta face. suck it up!