I think its because you were worrying about your family...like what they would say if they found out you smoked weed. Or I'm totally wrong. But the first time I smoked it was one of the best highs I ever had, very euphoric, I was in a great mood, and I wasn't worried one bit about parents/family/whatever. Maybe smoke in a more relaxed environment, get some good tunes playing, and enjoy it.
Happy tokin'