Christ rose up today

[hempity]

Christ rose up today
and then went back to bed as it was way to early and no one was up yet, the coffee wasn't made, and his first appointment wasn't till eight thirty, something about fixing a club foot.
He had a press conference at 10:00 am and was expected to be quite Godly as the wire service would be there to broadcast his news to the whole listing world.
He was back, and they wanted to make a big thing out of it, couldn't he just kick back for a day and smoke some good weed?
every where he went people were following, he would look behind him and sure enough there they were, followers, even into the bathroom, couldn't they take a hint. get a life he wanted to scream, but you have to lead by example and he didn't want to scare them, they were so unpredictable when you did that.
at ten he had to have his shit together and tell them there were now twelve or was it thirteen total commandments, he knew that he had the original ten firmly entrenched in most followers minds, he had already told them the eleventh, it was not a hard one, LOVE ONE ANOTHER AS I HAVE LOVED YOU.
he wasn't sure how they would take the twelfth one, because it would actually help them, and they didn't help themselves very readily.
how would he break it to them? just come out and say it??
might scare them, or they may not believe it, but they had to, right? seeing who is saying it, he had to at least have a reputation as an honest man.
he may as well get up again, with all this on his mind he wouldn't sleep anyway and the dreams about Mary Magdelan were about to cause his sheets to get wet,
man she could party, all night long.
he wanted to get the paper from the bushes where the little fat kid threw it as he puffed and grunted his way through the neighbourhood. but they would be out there, trying to get a look through the windows and crawling around on the roof, TV was off they had already broke the satellite, followers, God love 'em, maybe if he got a dog, no, it would have to be a heavenly dog and that might attract more. well at least he had time for a nice fat spliff, before he had to shit and shower and put on his media clothes, at least he didn't have to shave. what a weird thing to do he thought, were they all trying to look like women? maybe it was a way to capture youth, he would have to ask someone.
maybe he should hide the twelfth under a rock and hope some Christian in their search for his Father find it, but no, it was too important for that, he just had to come out an say it. but it was so short, one word, would they laugh, he hoped so.
that would help them to do it.
aaahhh he thought, thank you Father for the weed, good shit, now he could tell them.
he would walk right up to the mic and say RELAX, that should do it, they could wait a while for the next one.
of course he would have to answer questions, maybe if he told them the benefits, like, it allows you to accept more love, you can take more pain, how well he knew that one, how much relaxation was a part of a good health plan, how being relaxed in a car crash would save your life, he had a million of them.
stoned he headed for the bathroom to have a heavenly shit, relaxing sure helps that, he thought.

hempity Reviewed by hempity on 10-13-2005. Christ rose up today Christ rose up today and then went back to bed as it was way to early and no one was up yet, the coffee wasn't made, and his first appointment wasn't till eight thirty, something about fixing a club foot. He had a press conference at 10:00 am and was expected to be quite Godly as the wire service would be there to broadcast his news to the whole listing world. He was back, and they wanted to make a big thing out of it, couldn't he just kick back for a day and smoke some good weed? every Rating: 5

[Euphoric]

um.
you suck.

[hempity]

relax

[Euphoric]

*takes a deep breath*



~butterfly floats by~


hmmm..you suck.

[hempity]

you must be a christian

[Euphoric]

wow, i could verbally abuse you for hours. poor lil fella... *pat on the head*

i simply found it annoying that you'd post this thread twice. Its too obvious that this is geared to get a reaction from Torog, too. *sighs* welcome to muh ignore list.

[hempity]

I didn't realize i was on the spiritual board when i reloaded the page.
sorry, i try to keep my shit on one board, ask Ron
screw a reaction from any one least of all torog
i think the story is funny and there is a commandment to relax
people need to hear it, maybe it will help stop wars, hard to want to kill someone when you're real relaxed

[hempity]

wow, i could verbally abuse you for hours. poor lil fella... *pat on the head*

i simply found it annoying that you'd post this thread twice. Its too obvious that this is geared to get a reaction from Torog, too. *sighs* welcome to muh ignore list.

thank you for putting me on your ignore list, the name is hempity
you and torog must have a lot in common, myopia being some of it.
so thanks again, maybe turog could put me on his also
minds have to be a little open to let anything in
so long and thanks for all the fish
mitaoyate,
hempity

[Torog]

I didn't realize i was on the spiritual board when i reloaded the page.
sorry, i try to keep my shit on one board, ask Ron
screw a reaction from any one least of all torog
i think the story is funny and there is a commandment to relax
people need to hear it, maybe it will help stop wars, hard to want to kill someone when you're real relaxed

Howdy hempity,

We all relate to God and Jesus Christ,in our own way..whom am I to judge you or your relationship with God and Christ ? For all I know,Jesus liked your story as well,also,I find your 11th commandment,to be a good thing and the 12th..ain't far off the mark either,if not right on the head. God wants us to be happy and to have happy lives,and we can do that-by trusting that He will take care of us.

When I git stoned,I have a rule..basically..it's to relax..no news,no political arguments..only positive energy..I have no taste for argueing with liberals or anyone else,once I git stoned..lol. I'm of the belief that God created marijuana,so that we could relax..and put aside,for awhile,strife and negativity..I certainly feel the oneness of all things,when I'm stoned..it's like emerging from solitary,after many years..and what was once bound..is now free.

Have a good one ...

[hempity]

Howdy hempity,

We all relate to God and Jesus Christ,in our own way..whom am I to judge you or your relationship with God and Christ ? For all I know,Jesus liked your story as well,also,I find your 11th commandment,to be a good thing and the 12th..ain't far off the mark either,if not right on the head. God wants us to be happy and to have happy lives,and we can do that-by trusting that He will take care of us.

When I git stoned,I have a rule..basically..it's to relax..no news,no political arguments..only positive energy..I have no taste for argueing with liberals or anyone else,once I git stoned..lol. I'm of the belief that God created marijuana,so that we could relax..and put aside,for awhile,strife and negativity..I certainly feel the oneness of all things,when I'm stoned..it's like emerging from solitary,after many years..and what was once bound..is now free.

Have a good one ...

Ho Torog,

well that is twice you have surprised me, and i love surprises, getting older seems to agree with you.
this post is worth answering, some of your friends seem to be too frightened to deal with, sometimes peoples pain/fear stops them from accepting any help, no matter how bad it is needed.
i love Christ, and aspire to be like him, i also think even he would be mad the way people have used him for any number of excuses to do bad things.
he is/was a man, as a man he had to eat, drink, and shit and i am sure he at least thought about sex.
sometimes peoples fear overcomes their hearing along with their reason, i find that humour can help them to listen and not want to crucify anyone.
God wants you to be happy for no reason, that may well be another commandment, but we will have to wait for the next episode to find out.
cannabis can help you to do that, i think it is almost an insult to God for you not to be happy, look what he gave you, what the fuck else do you want?? are you going to wait for your new caddie to be happy?
people waiting for their ship to come in just don't realize it is tied up at the dock.
btw. the eleventh commandment is in the new testament, and bibles, before 1980 were all made from hemp.
love your life, you may not get another...
keep smokin' that shit!

mitaoyate,
hempity