Yesterday, I thought the All-American Carpet Man stole my steamroller (my smoking device).

This is why.

When he left, I was closing the door behind him and said, "Tell Ruth thanks," and he turned and smiled, but he had a mischievous look in his eye.

So when I went to smoke a hit, I looked for my steamroller and couldn't find it, then I remembered the reason why he gave me a sly smile was probably because he had my steamroller in his pocket. I had no clue where I had left it and frantically searched, when I saw it sitting there, on top of my ottoman, in the middle of the living room. The room where he'd been fixing the carpet.