Got two new ones from a friend of mine who was blazed yesterday. Three people just smoked 5 gram of seriously quality chronic:

"Dude, I was just fighting a stick, and I won! But it's a plant-- keep that in mind."

Him: Dude, are you throwing rocks?
Me: Yeah, why?
Him: Man, you shouldn't throw rocks in a glass house, but we're not in a glass house. But we could be. But we're probably not, because we're outside."

Those were the only two I wrote down; there were many more where those two came from.