You might be a stoner if you bike to the store to get food but forget your money, go back to get your money, return to the store, buy the food, go home, but then don't eat it cause your to faded.

OR

You might be a stoner if you go to McDonalds drive thru at three in the morning, spend ten minutes yelling into the order station for fucking apple pies, then realize its closed and go home.