I think I get what you were saying (though it seems to have come out wrong). You're right, people just need to relax about it in general, but there's a reason most of us are "on edge".

We have a lot to lose.

I think the best possible policy is to be discreet with your use and your produce (if you grow), and generally not make yourself a target for cops (I personally think dreadlocks kick ass, but may not be suitable for a 30 something or someone with kids). You can love weed and all of its beauty, but if you're concerned that someone might bust you, then don't post a picture of you and your crops on the net.

Either way, relax on the message boards, and maybe posts like this won't be necessary. If all else fails, smoke more pot.