Kim Jong Il, the best golfer on the planet.

[Hydrizzle]

Move over Tiger: N. Korea's Kim shot 38 under par his 1st time out

Special to World Tribune.com
EAST-ASIA-INTEL.COM
Wednesday, June 16, 2004

Tiger Woods couldn't hold a candle to North Korea's Kim Jong-Il, if nation's government-controlled media reports are to be believed.
South Korea's Pyeonghwa (Peace) Motors Corporation plans to stage an inter-Korean golf game next month in the North's capital city, Pyongyang, company officials say.

"We have agreed with North Korean authorities to hold a friendly golf competition between the two Koreas from July 30 to Aug. 5 at a golf course in Pyongyang," said an official at Pyeonghwa Motors, which has started a business venture in North Korea.

Fortunately for all entrants, North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il will not be playing. If the official government media is to be believed, Kim is easily the greatest golfer, the world has ever seeen.

Pyongyang media say North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il enjoys golf, having shot multiple holes-in-one during his first try at the game. He reportedly aced five holes and finished 38 under par on the golf course. The "Great Leader" routinely shoots three or four holes-in-one per round, the government-controlled media reported.

The event, to be dubbed a "golf game for peaceful unification of Korea," will be attended by South Korea's top 15 female golfers, including LPGA players, 30 businesspersons and 20 singers and movie stars, the official said.

From the North's side, eight female amateur players and dozens of government officials as well as foreign diplomats in Pyongyang would also take part in the friendly game, he said. "They will compete in a 36-hole [competition] for the prize money of 100 million Won ($86,000)," the official said. Park Sang-Kwon, the company's president, was in Pyongyang to work out the details, he said.

A portrait of North Korean leader Kim Jong-il is displayed at a hotel in the N. Korean capital Pyongyang May 2.
North Korea has only one 18-hole golf course in Pyongyang. The North's media have said the 7,000-meter (7,700-yard) course is "in full line with international standards." The course, built in the mid-1980s by North Korean businessmen based in Japan, "bustled with Pyongyang citizens, overseas Koreans and foreigners," the North's official Korean Central News Agency said. Surrounded by a forest and a scenic lake, golfers can enjoy collecting plants and boating during breaks, it said.

"The course is not bad. North Koreans seemed to keep it well-managed," said a Pyeonghwa Motors official who has frequently traveled to the North.

Kim Dong-Wook, general secretary at South Korea's Golf Association, said golf is almost nonexistent in the North. "We believe there are no professional golfers," he said. Outside their country, North Korean golfers have yet to make a mark.

OMG I sure hope he doesn't join the PGA... would hate to have our enemy win a tourney in our country! Well, my bet's on the dictator!!!

Hydrizzle Reviewed by Hydrizzle on 08-04-2005. Kim Jong Il, the best golfer on the planet. OMG I sure hope he doesn't join the PGA... would hate to have our enemy win a tourney in our country! Well, my bet's on the dictator!!! Rating: 5

[Cacophony]

Thats all I can say about this. If this is true, well fuck i don't know golf will be even more boring to watch.

[o2bn420]

yes, but isn't he lonely?

[Hydrizzle]

oh yes, he's RONERY all right

[Beeblebrox.420]

Did you miss this part?

The "Great Leader" routinely shoots three or four holes-in-one per round, the government-controlled media reported.

It's all bullshit.

[del...]

too bad espn isn't covering it...neither are the bookies in vegas, for some reason...

[NowhereMan]

golf?>
wtf
that aint even a sport.
now if they would let ya tackle somebody for being on your green
that be cool to watch
but fuck sake that shit boring as hell

[ermitonto]

Yeah, why would the government-controlled media report the object of their cult of personality as a bad golfer? Remember that episode of the Simpsons where Homer was the leader of the Stonecutters, and they were cheating to make him win at bowling, pool and cards, so he would appear to be the best at everything? Or when Smithers was planting balls to make Mr. Burns win at golf when the Simpsons joined that country club? Same thing is probably going on here.

[Hydrizzle]

I really hope you guys don't think I'm that stupid, to think that anyone could get 38 under par thier 1st time playing. I heard about this on the Boortz show, and it fucking cracked me up, how he thinks anyone will believe him.

Next thing ya know ole' Kim will be claiming to be the best offensive lineman in the world.

[Beeblebrox.420]

I didn't think you believed it, but I wanted to point out the obvious for the more credulous folks amongst us. Some people will believe nearly anything you tell them.