Thanks for responding and reading the whole thing lol. It's pretty long. It was pretty bad, you're right. I get scared just thinking about all of the stuff I did. Chems can really fuck up your brain. I thought ecstacy was a friendly drug when i started taking it because it made me feel so fucking good. I hate how they say ecstacy isnt physically addictive. I think thats b.s. I've read that you can't get addicted to it and i find that pretty hard to believe because i had horrible withdrawal after stopping. After the last time I did it, i was a wreck. I had to see a psychologist every 2 days and i couldnt sleep because i was so scared and paranoid and messed up. I actually slept in my moms room on her floor because I felt so vulnerable and unsafe for some reason. It was the most horrible time of my life. I can't even explain how it feels to do E for that long and then take 14 pills in a night and just stop all of the sudden. It really messed me up and part of it was the overdose of the 14 pills. It changed my brain forever. It must be really damaged. If anyone else has had brain damage from drugs and can't work or go to school or hang out with friends and more i'd really like to know it cuz i feel like i'm the only one who's had their brain ruined by drugs. I only did ecstacy heavily for maybe 8 months or so everyday and i od'd alot of times and it totally changed my brain. I've seen people who've done drugs for their whole lives who havent experienced anything close to whats wrong with me. They are still able to live and work normally and they are very productive. Like how could this happen to me. I just turned 20. It's been years and it only keeps getting worse. I do not use drugs now. I don't drink. I smoke one cigarette a day. Mind you i am on methadone for pain and it helps to alleviate some of the mental problems for some reason. It makes me feel more human than how i felt without it. I guess it just kinda gives me a little bit of pleasure and i need that because my brain obviously doesnt make enough happy chemicals. I really think opiates could be used for bad ass depression and psychological problems but thats just what i think cuz it worked for me. since i was 13 i used painkillers and they helped me through some of the hardest times of my life. I do not attribute any of my brain damage to them. Because i felt fine even after years of taking them moderately everyday and i could stop and feel pretty normal. Only when i started taking E, my health went downhill. Opiates are highly addictive though and turn you into a slave for them but as long as you dont run out of them your somewhat okay. If you are maintained well you will be fine. Once you run out you go psycho though.

IF YOU'RE GOING TO DO DRUGS!!! TAKE THEM IN MODERATION!!! DO NOT OVERDO IT LIKE I DID OR YOU MAY HAVE IRREVERSIBLE BRAIN DAMAGE. ANYONE WHO HAS HAD THEIR LIFE STOLEN FROM THEM BY THIS SHIT WILL TELL YOU EXACTLY WHAT I TOLD YOU!!! BE SMART!!! THIS ALL HAPPENED TO ME WHEN I WAS ABOUT 18...I WAS YOUNG AND STUPID AND THOUGHT NOTHING WOULD EVER HAPPEN TO ME!!! I WAS SO WRONG.


Please leave me your email if you've had brain damage from drugs. Really bad brain damage. I don't mean stuff like depression. I mean neurological problems, trouble hearing, seeing. And also if you have pain, and have not been able to lead a normal life. I need to know i'm not alone in this nightmare.

Thanks so much for reading my posts. You're all very nice people. I wish everyone was as kind as all of you. Happy growing.

Use drugs and alcohol in moderation