My ecstacy experience!!!

[ontariogrower]

Oh my i just got back from the Doctor. She doesn't know what to make of my illnesses. She now is treating me for Lupus with Hydroxychloroquine and Amitriptyline for my sleep but i doubt it's going to make me feel better. Apparently i have a little bit of fybromalgia as well. My fever was 101.2 at 8:30 am this morning when i went in. This is only the first time i've seen this doctor and i'm hoping she'll help me out some more. I hope i eventually get back to normal. I'm glad to hear that the person who posted above me got back to "normal" after using psychedelics. I wish she would have just given me some real medication so i dont need to keep bumming meds off of my family members. I hate when doctors give you something thats probably not goign to work and they send you home to wait for months to try something new!!! I've already been on Amytriptyline, and it didnt do anything to help me. It just made me feel like shit. So i'm kinda bummed out about that. I guess i kinda want the doctor to acknowledge i'm in serious pain and i'm sick as hell and she has but she's giving me stuff thats useless. My mom can lead a normal life and she feels 50% better than me and she has all sorts of medications. I don't understand why she got all them so quickly and i've been sick for almost 3 years now and no one is willing to really give me something to help me. It's bullshit, so i shall wait some more. yipee. Oh well im going to sleep now i'm tired. I got 24 vials of blood taken from me today. Take care everyone. Oh i also have a ton of tests coming up. All sorts of CAT scans and MRI's and ultrasounds that i've already had many times. At least she's checking me out well. No doctor seemed to care except for her and my hematologist so yay.

I had 10 plants, i found out 3 are female the rest are males and hanging in a bathroom near you!

[Dick Justice]

You don't suppose that doctor is giving you the shit because your problem is drug related? I know a lot of people love to harp on their stigmas, it's downright discriminatory! (green power, etc)

[ontariogrower]

I wouldnt tell her about the drugs. Lol. Thats not happening. If you say that no doctor will respect you at all. I'd rather just pretend i am unlucky and got some disease. lol. I want to see what she says and see if she can figure out wahts wrong on her own. Don't ever tell your doctor your a former drug user or depressive or anything or they will not treat you right. In my experience they look down on you and they don't care good care of you. I'll see what she says. If she coems up with some disease, then thats fine with me i'd rather just go along with that than say ohhh i fried my own brain. I'ts much easier to cope when someone tells you that you have a legitimate illness. I know my brain is fried to a certain degree but i could also have health issues that aren't related to that. I know i'm kinda ignoring part of the problem but i need a doctor to tell me i have something because the fact is i can't work, i can't go to school, i can barely go out, maybe once a month i'll go out to the store. I have a desire to go out and do things. I just find it incapacitating. I feel so ill all the time. I need a diagnosis so i can apply for disability and so i can get help from the government when i need it. I know it sounds scumbaggish but i honestly cannot do anything and i'm not going to go suffer and be homeless because for 8 motnhs of my life i did drugs. What would you do?