BEWARE OF HEIFFERS!

[ontariogrower]

Hahaha...I was chatting with this bitch online, man i dont know if you've ever had this horrible shit happen to you but anyways.......I got a pic of her....and it was kinda like the neck up. So anyways we kinda fell a quarter in love i guess and i ended up driving to toronto to see her. Which is like......4 hours away. Anyways i got there and met her. She pulled up in her car. Again i only saw her face, she was quite pretty...I start following her back to her house and i parked....I got out of my car..then...i hear a horrible rumble, and coming towards me, she was about 5'11 and some sort of fat breasted, huge ass, godzilla. Of course I was much to nice and way to shy to run away and besides, I'm a good guy, i can see past the weight and height. Or so i thought. Anyways, we walked up the stairs to her apartment and her ass was massive, it reminded me of one of those big exercise balls that women work out on. I kept staring and i started feeling nauseaus, but it was okay. I was going to be okay, i could get past this and spear the white whale. We approached the door to her apartment and i heard her say, " I saw you looking at my ass" and she gave it a smack. The sound echoed for all to hear and i'm sure the man standing in the hall vomited shortly after seeing this cow. We walked into the apartment and i sat down on the couch and quickly began thinking about alcohol and how much i would have to drink before i went down on this heiffer. She came over to the couch with a bottle of vodka and i let out a sigh of relief and quickly poured a drink for myself. I finished the drink and went to get another and another until i was at 3 drinks. She had drank about 5 because she was obviously a booze slut. She took my foot and placed it on her crotch and i tried to smile but i grimmaced as i felt touching her genitals. She then downed 10 more glasses of orange juice and vodka and the bitch CUT ME OFF AT THE 3 I HAD!!!!!!! She got up and stumbled around and told me to come closer. I, reluctantly, stood up and proceeded towards the sow, she grabbed me and dragged me into her room and lay me down on the bed and stripped. Only in a bakery had i seen so many rolls. I began to get butterflies, i pinched myself to make sure i wasn't having another nightmare about moby dick. The grabbed me and stripped me and tried to touch my balls and i decided i had to do something quick. I made up an excuse and lay down and said i was tired from the 4 hour drive. I pretended i had a headache and that i couldn't possibly perform tonight but maybe tommorow. I lay in bed and the drunken whore lay down beside me and started to cry. I again pinched myself and wondered if this was really happening. Was she really crying because i wouldnt fuck her? Inside my mind i was laughing at the pathetic whore, but i was even more pathetic for falling for the old face picture on yahoo. I should have known that from the neck down she had the figure of a grizzly bear. Before i knew it she was begging me to fuck her and i again made up an excuse and after alot of crying and whining i finally agreed to shove my fingers in this fatties buttery cunt. She asked me how many i could fit, so i jammed my fingers in her with force trying to rip her nasty cunt but her fat pussy strangled my fingers and rendered them helpless. I was powerless, her pussy had a hold on me. I kept fingerfucking until finally i had 5!!! YES FIVE FUCKING FINGERS IN THIS PORKER!!! I was amazed at how loose she was, but in a split second i was nauseated. It seemed that when i put my fingers in her, i had released her scent. Her cum was thick and the fingers seemed to be wafting a rotten garbage smell into the air. I reached for some form of gas mask, but there was none there so i just grabbed a sock and placed it over my nose. I fingered her until she came. Then i went to wash my hands....i noticed thick white GOO! ALL OVER MY FUCKING HANDS. IT WAS CRUSTY TOO!!!! Well, long story short......I snuck out when she passed out and stopped at the nearest gas station to shoot gas all over my hands to kill whatever that nasty shit was!!!


MY WARNING IS!!! DO NOT MEET CHICK ON THE NET UNTIL YOU SEE A BODY PIC!!!! I MADE A DUMB MISTAKE!! WHEN YOU SEE A WHITE WHALE!!! RUN...............



P.S I have nothing against fat chicks.......only REALLY REALLY FAT CHICKS WHO ARE like 6 ft tall with asses a meter in width......!!!!! My woman is 210 lbs and 5'6 and i love her chubby ass. But man this other chick was a whale. fuck. Her name is carla and she's from mississauga! run for your life if you meet her in yahoo chat or anywhere else.

ontariogrower Reviewed by ontariogrower on 07-08-2005. BEWARE OF HEIFFERS! Hahaha...I was chatting with this bitch online, man i dont know if you've ever had this horrible shit happen to you but anyways.......I got a pic of her....and it was kinda like the neck up. So anyways we kinda fell a quarter in love i guess and i ended up driving to toronto to see her. Which is like......4 hours away. Anyways i got there and met her. She pulled up in her car. Again i only saw her face, she was quite pretty...I start following her back to her house and i parked....I got out of Rating: 5

[slipknotpsycho]

....boy, i can't wait to see what some people are going to say about your post .....i'm thinking mainly stedric, maryjane, and uhm.....cheery..yea that's my bet.


since you posted this elsewhere i'm posting what i said in refrence to the other one.

[burnitup]

Thats a nightmare if I ever heard one, goodluck erasing those visuals from your memory. Had a girl with a really smelly cooter once myself didnt even let those juices touch me. Feel sorry for ya bro, my condolensces.

[EverydayJunglist]

Well i do not have anything against fat people,but i'm sure you will get some nasty replies....personally i found your story very humorous in a mean kinda way...hilarious nonethless.

"only in a bakery i seen so many rolls" hehe so harsh

just admit you porked that booze slut good!

[Cheery Cherry]

So let me get this straight, you have a woman, who is over 200 lbs., and you decided to shop around for another woman online and ended up with a bigger woman. Because you drove four hours to meet her, you decided to stick around and because you're a "nice guy", you string her along so you can get some booze out of her?

So when you were chatting with her on Yahoo, you were only interested in sex, correct? I say you got what you deserved. Does your woman know about this adventure of yours?

[ontariogrower]

Oh Cherry. I wasn't shopping around for a new fat chick. This happened about 2 years ago. I'm not trying to be mean or anything and i wasn't just trying to lead her on. This all happened within like.......a few hours. I just didnt know how to get out of there. This girl was like 350 lbs!!!!!! I don't hate big girls at all. Chubby chicks can be beautiful and my woman is. There is, nasty fat, and pretty fat and this carla ho qualified as the nasty fat. Me mean? Fuck that, i think not disclosing that she was 350lbs was fucking mean and nasty. She lied to me before i came and we talked for months and she didnt even tell me the truth. If it wasnt such a big fucking surprise i might have handled it better. Beware of the women online who lie about their weight!!!!! She made it sound like she was just a tiny bit chubby but this was not the case. So i suggest you make the girl your talking to show you her body so you can be sure you dont end up with a 350lb whackjob. If she wasnt so fat her pussy wouldnt have smelled like shit i bet. This thing was festering with bacteria and only God knows what else. When a girls ass is 3 times the size of mine, it's bad news!!!! You can't blame me for running.

[Euphoric]

OMFG HHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHAHAHA POETRY!!!

[Cheery Cherry]

Oh okay...I guess I misunderstood at first, sorry .

[Juggalotus17]

Bro i seriously have to thank you. You couldn't have made my night any funnier. I hope you don't take this offensivly, but that is one of the funniest things i have ever fucking heard!!!!!

[slipknotpsycho]

the wording was funny, but the whole concept behind it was just mean....but i can't say much i probably would've done the same thing. with the posting about it exempt...that one woulda went into the shawn-vault and never came out like a lot more