Is there a Back door in the laundry.?.

if so go round the outside of the house and open it..
come back inside.
get a Broom or somthing long and just sweep the bloody mess out the door.
and Kick your B/F's ass for leaving that shit there when he knows your phobia..

or Get a plastic Bag put your hand inside it and pick up the stuff that way.
cover your mouth with your shirt.

unless you want the washing machine repair man to find your bong.
odd's are he's probably a choofer anyways..