go buy a pipe for like 10 bucks, they are usualy at joke shops, smoke shops etc...

if you absoutly must

get a bottle of coke, drink it

get an empty pen tube and poke a hole in the side and make it air tight with play doh or gum

now get a screen and cover the top of the bottle and playdoh that up and cover with tape.

put ur weed in the top and suck out of the pen.

here, a quick diagram.