Get a recording of a really big dog barking & growling, then find a techno geek who can rig your recorder/cd player, what ever, to a motion detector, having 'the dog' replay every time the motion detector is tripped. Maybe even you yelling something like 'WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOURE DOING!' along with the viscous sounding dog. Of course its someone you know. I'm into vigilante justice, but if I told you what I would do, Weeze would scold me! (I'm a BAD girl)!