I'm also wondering if anyone has any specific info about testing at a hospital, if they typically make you sign the waiver that says that it's okay to do genetic testing on the urine to verify that it's indeed mine and human.
Even on the off-chance that the hospital produces a consent form for genetic testing, you, as an employee, have the right to refuse consent to any genetic profiling under the Genetic Information Nondiscrimination Act (GINA) in which was signed into law in '05 (and revised in '08 to protect individuals from genetic discrimination by insurance companies) by then-President George Bush.

Even if the GINA Act was not in place, genetic testing is very costly and complicated in process. If the hospital really had a monomania about deterring sample subbing, they would resort to a less costly (not to mention compliant) alternative testing method, such as hair testing.

Next, I went to my local headshop to buy the Vale Triple Strength detox drink. Followed the instructions to a T. Also bought a more expensive THC test there on the assumption that maybe its the problem of cheap tests from the dollar store. No luck. Drink didn't work. I went back to my head shop today to chat with the guy there and he said that it probably didn't work because I had been drinking a shit ton of water before I drank the detox drink and that the drink didn't properly line my stomache?
The headshop operator doesnt know what the hell he is talking about and just needs to stick with selling tokeware and stop playing human physiology... What the hell makes this guy think that THC is stored in the stomach? What makes this guy think things go from from the stomach straight to the urine?
To think things enter the body and goes through it untouched shows how ludicrously nonsensical the headshop operators explanation was towards you. And in the words of Judge Judy: "If something doesnt make sense, its not the truth!"

Magic detox potions do not create barriers or "liners" anywhere - not your stomach, not your blood vessels, not your kidneys, not your bladder, - NOT ANYWHERE!

ALL detox products "work" via the dilution principle (that is when they do work at all). That means they "work" because of the water that youre required by the instructions to drink with them. By consuming the fluids, all youre doing is diluting the THCA concentration that is present in the bladder (providing that the THCA concentration is not too high). You can accomplish the same thing for $$$ less by drinking straight tap water.

Bottom line is the headshop operator had scammed you in an effort to seperate you from your hard-earned cash, and youve fell for it - hook, line, and sinker.