Let me break out before I break down

[Darkneon420]

Yeah god wants me to be happy, but be happy doing what he has comanded me to do. Its just that I let someone into my life when I really should have avioded those emotions until I am much older. Thjats what god put me here o but I was to busy thinking only about things i want and not the things i was suposed to do.

Thanks guys this is really helping me get things out. I...well when I talk to Luc about it he doesent seem to make any effort to want to be reasonable...we both just dont have the heart to say its over............well in our hearts it burns more than ever. I wish one day he might become a believer too and then we could be together forever but if he does I dont want him to do it for me, I want him to do it for himself and god.

I tried talking to my mom but all she tels me is what I dident want to hear...im not asking her anything about this from now on...life sure is a bitch sometimes!

Darkneon420 Reviewed by Darkneon420 on 04-28-2005. Let me break out before I break down The day I met Luc i dident look at him the way I do now...Never have I thought one day i'de be crying over something imaginary, something I spent 4 months dreaming and planning my future for. All now bullshit. When i thought my mind was such a innocent, beautiful, mysterious thing its all gone to hell now. My heart has been breaking since the day my step father said aload its discusting for a muslim women to marry a non believer. And lately my life has been full of God, Luc, and pot. I never Rating: 5

[Darkneon420]

Smoking is also taboo for muslim women, true?

i have no idea...i guess not because it does harm to my body. But one thing at a time...besides im not so concered about something I can stop in one secound than something that will take time to change.

[richieguy69]

Wouldn't God want you to have love for yourself along with him? He put you on earth as a creation, not as his slave. You must think, the Qu' Ran was written a long time ago, when women were not as high as men on the social pyramid. Same with Christianity or just about any other religion. I personally am Buddhist and respect all religions and prophets. I'm really not trying to bash your religion, but if God does everything for a reason, and he made you love Luc, then is he doing it to torture you? Ask yourself that.



P.S. If you answer he is testing you, shouldn't the almighty KNOW if you have faith in him? His law was written by MAN not by his hand.

[kuulbns]

Just trying to give you an example Dark. I was raised in an extreme Christian doctrine, so I understand to a degree. But how far do ya let it go? Would you wear the Burkha? In my background we couldn't wear makeup, jewelry, or cut our hair, ever. Women have to wear skirts or dresses and the man is the head of the home. Husbands must be approved by family and the Pastor. No Dancing, no cards, no music unless it's in praise of God. No Smoking, No drinking, no coffee, no tv allowed. Follow what's best for YOU, and I'll pray that you're happy. Kuu

[kyle]

Ah..So many things I want to say and so many things I'm going to say. First of all, I personally don't beleive in God or a god. I beleive we all have a spirit, yes. But I refuse to beleive that one superior power rules us all. But I'm not here to change your beleifs, I can respect the fact you choose to beleive.

But, God - would want you to be happy? Would he not. I can't beleive that your god that you worship and respect greatly would banish you to 'hell' for love. Even though that's what the book says, how can you know exactly what god wants? You can't, not until you die and go and "meet your maker". You live your life to be happy and to fall inlove, I beleive that's the ultimate purpose for being here, weather we be put here by your god or someone else's or through the process of evolution or the 10,000 other theories out their - to find the one you love. Enjoy your life and fall in love and go with it. If it were me, I would'nt lose someone I love.

Anyway, I hope you end up happy, I don't know you too well. But your a good person and you deserve to be happy, so good luck.

[Darkneon420]

Richie, you sound almost like a muslim yourself lol. I dont know all the answers to my stuation, I find it hard that something so good is forbidden but I AM gods slave. He created me. He is first before all others. I heard god loves those he challenges most. I do believ he knows how faithful to him...but then why dont I make my salat five times a day...or any at all? I dont now all the answers but i will find out my own dystany someday. Weither Luc is in it or not. I cant go through these changes alone and Luc and I are partners and we're gunna work things out. I believe since we love eachother so much anything we do can be possable or permissable...hopefully something changes. Anything at all...

BTW, If I werent muslim i'de be buddhist. You know Muslims believe Buddah to be a prophet. He was very wise and peaceful man.

Im really interested in what Lulu has to say...lulu could you give me some advice? Or ocram? Ghostoker? perhaps torog?

I really appreciate everybodys replys, especaily Kuu and richie. Thanks so much guys!!!

[Darkneon420]

ah yes and thanks to Jackie as well.

[richieguy69]

I guess i've never thought of myself sounding like a muslim before, lol. But basically what i'm saying is, if god put you on this earth, why would he need you as his slave? It makes no sense to me. I'm not a huge "go to church, pray every nite, don't laugh at blasphemy, swearing isn't funny" sort of guy but i know enough about god to know that if he did put us on this earth, then it was for our hapiness, not so that were his slave. If we were his slaves, why is there free will?

[Darkneon420]

I dunno...i really have no intention of doing anything but trying to please my creator...thats all im doing. and if i do that i should be happy. But im not so only time will tell. Just a while lot of waiting...waiting to get out of school, get this court shit finished, and die.............dunno but if I wnat to do anything in this world is to make god proud of me and then my family proud of me, and then Luc proud of me. lol sound slike my life should be simpler if I did that. No worrys cuz I know if I die im gunna be in paradise with everyone that I sorounded myself with on earth and if I choose to be around those people im sure they too will go to were I will. I just dont know...I feel better tho. I feel like if I just focuz on right now with religion, school, and my behavior then i should be the happiest person alive. I'll smoke to that! or uh pray for it at least.

[GHoSToKeR]

"We werent put on earth to be happy"

Who the hell says we werent? Fuck that. Im gonna spend my short time here being as happy as i possibly can. Fuck anybody who tries to stop me.

PS: People who say 'we werent put here to be happy' piss me off almost as much as people who say 'life isnt about having fun' or 'life is about responsibility'. fuck you. if you wanna live your life like that than fine, but dont bring me down.

Darkneon, listen.. its up to YOU how you live your life. If you feel that you can still be faithful to your religion while going out with a guy who isnt also a Muslim, then go ahead and do it.