Hello Kyjaun,

First let me say thank you, for your honorable service to our country.
Second I am extremely sorry for all you have and are going thru.
There seems to be more PTSD cases from the Iraq/Afgani wars then any conflict that's gone on before. Maybe it's just more accepted diagnosis or more recognized now, tho I think it has more to do with the heavy burden that's been placed on our citizen soldiers, the reserves and the guard.

I served during the Korean War (police action) and returned home an angry young man. Probably a case of mild PTSD brought about by losing a close buddy while we were running for cover during a mortar attack. My first thought was thank God it was him not me, and it made me feel awefull for thinking that. I sort relief by drinking heavy and that almost cost me my family. Then one day, in a bar a police dective who was a WW2 vet got to talking to me. I told him what was burdening my heart and he reassured me that first thought, better him not me, was really normal. Even tho I had told that story to a VA shrink, who offered me nothing but barbiurates (a great combo for someone drinking heavy) it was that dective that made me feel better and helped to turn things around for me.

For the last 25 years I've been providing medical mj to patients thru a cancer group (people fighting the disease and treatments) and a hospice group (people dying...usally from cancer). About 5 yrs ago I had the privilege to meet and help a recently returned vet, who was an amputee and had been found to suffer from PTSD by the VA. Same story, they gave him all kinds of pain killers and mood altering crap and he really suffered from them. He was seeking an alternative and I provided it. He did very well with mmj, it relieved pain and also helped him mentally to get better. After a couple of years he had gotten his shit together but then hit that VA catch 22, lost part of his disability (for the PTSD). But he was happy, they couldn't take it all away because of his lost limb.

I truly wish that we were geographicly closer, I'm on the other coast in a non-med state, because I'd love to meet and try to help you. While it is against forum rules to do hookups here, I truly hope someone from these boards who is near you in Washington state that is a med user or caregiver reaches out to you.

I hope and pray that you can find some help, mmj is worth the try.
May God bless you in your time of troubles.

OM