Hi guys,

I'm 21 years old and in jersey, don't really like it here, but that's the least of my...stories. Anyway, I am trying to get some opinions on this....

Up until a few months ago (I believe it was largely from food allergies, but the doctor for awhile didn't really check for this) I had major heartburn problems that weren't solved by medicines at all, so I resorted to opiates (mostly poppy tea) to calm them. I never did it so much to become addicted, and I would say I'm still not addicted (at least not severely since I've stuck to the same low dose for about 7 months) but I am growing frustrated with it. I know several times I've taken it a few weeks in a row and gotten some mild withdrawals, but I had no problem leaving it and going back to my normal several times a week routine. I have many other chronic problems including asthma and tendonitis and am often under constant pain/irritation. On top of this I have a lot of buried severe emotional problems that completely knock all the energy out of me.

What scares me is not the prospect of going into hard drugs or whatever, but that nowadays I've realized that I am completely dysfunctional and my willpower is completely shot, and I need some kind of fix to get my life back in order. It already is in order, but I'd like to better it even more but I just can't get the motivation to do anything. Anyway, I've had an encounter with marijuana once before, but it was negative because I wayyyy overdid it and was completely out of this world stoned to the point of a near panic attack. But I know its not the same as moderate usage so I am open to using it again. I want to ditch opium even though its effective and I haven't had severe addiction problems because I know its a dangerous road to go down, especially if i start to get more messed up and the side effects can be nasty. My life has been stressful since I was a kid as long as I remember, with virtually no respite ever (except a bit now, I have a loving girlfriend but too much damage has been done). I just want to cop out and take the edge off while I repair all the damage and numb all the stuff from my chronic health problems which irritate me endlessly. So, do you think moderate marijuana use would do the job? I know that NJ mmj laws suck; I'm sure in another state I could get it for the tendonitis pain and stomach problems (which I still do have, just not for the same severity).

Also, what would you recommend as a means of getting it? I blew off most of my buddies in high school out of anger at shallowness and lack of empathy, and it's coming back to bite me in the ass. I'm a commuter student and don't know many people any more, and despite my best efforts asking around and talking to many people (I'm very social, I run my own business and a lot of stuff) they usually just flop on me and don't come through.

I just don't know what the hell to do, I'm an absolute wreck and I need a break from all this. I know I can get better; I'm already better than 6 months ago but I seem to be stuck and I need a push and to clear my head of a lot of this stress. Anyway, thanks for all your help.
Ikons693 Reviewed by Ikons693 on . New from central NJ, need advice Hi guys, I'm 21 years old and in jersey, don't really like it here, but that's the least of my...stories. Anyway, I am trying to get some opinions on this.... Up until a few months ago (I believe it was largely from food allergies, but the doctor for awhile didn't really check for this) I had major heartburn problems that weren't solved by medicines at all, so I resorted to opiates (mostly poppy tea) to calm them. I never did it so much to become addicted, and I would say I'm still not Rating: 5