Just Another Crappy Day in Paradise Maui Grow Log

[LetsSeeYa]

You win either way.
If it's all delusion, it's marketable delusion.


Next crop disaster won't be a problem if you are getting residuals from your screenplay.

Your's is the best thread on da forums.
You have a talent for writing.

Gather some of your posts and run them by an agent.


I'm jus' sayin' do what you love, and the money will follow.

In other words,
Find something you love to do,
and someone is certain to screw it up by paying you.

Aloha grower,
Weeze

I couldn't agree with ya more Weez:thumbsup: I know i would read this thread in a book. And could be turned into on as im sure everything wasn't included for one reason or another. But it should be a Sticky no doubt. Maybe in Advanced Section as Rusty does the re veg inside and this was outside. I think it would fit there well as for the indoor grower or the outdoor grower could get major information. Just my 2 cents:thumbsup:



killer:rasta:

[nugssgalore]

I agree too Weez...very good reading, exciting...heck, P.J. Roarke quality. :thumbsup:

Your story is compelling oldhaole but please be careful, those sleezy guys aren't kidding. take very good care, glad your wife let go of her grudge!

[oldhaole]

The agreed upon sum has been deposited in all your accounts.

PJ O'rouke? Nugs you get a bonus. I have read "Eat The Rich", and "How to Drive Fast on Drugs While Getting Your Wing-Wang Squeezed and Not Spill Your Drink",

What a title. Still trying to perfect that art. One can dream though.

Weez. I am doing what I love to do. This forum is just gravy. Shit, when I go out and people ask me what I do...what can I say? Oh, I grow weed? Yea, that goes over well on the golf course. Now I get to say I grow weed, and tell all. Kewl.

Below is a pic of a couple of ozs. I found them out on the side of the road. I immediatly turned it to the proper authorties.

Life goes on. Trimmers are trimmin. Patient is out cherry picking the garage, looking for the best she can find for her next dig out. Sucker. My keepers are in the attic. And I would pay money to see her try to get up there. Hell, If she can get up there without killing herself I'll give it to her.

Nugs, Don't worry. The big deal is queer. Frankly it smells. Partner and I were talking about it on the way home. Stevie should have got a on the spot beating. Right there. Just on principal. Do that shit 20 years ago and you'd be lucky to wake up. Bunk the man. Smart. If that's the next generation, there in trouble.

Change gears.

A few quick tips,

1)When stage harvesting and trimming many different plants remember to seperate them, because if you just say fuck it, and hang them on one common line, when they are dry, you will have big problems sorting them all out....guess who did that.

2)The two big ones I staged gave me more than the ones that I just took em all. about 20% more.

3)When dealing with four women, a good I pod with appropriate music is a lifesaver. Think Rage Against The Machine. If you act like you can't hear them, they will go away.

Other than that I got nothing. No car chases, no shootouts, nothing!

The garage should be done by tommorow. I have half the living room dried and cured, ready to take off the stem.

Now I become the bottleneck. The one job I can do forever is knock dried buds off the stem. That's my reward. For a few hours I'm a kid again. Also it keeps the cut uniform, and everybody honest.

[oldhaole]

I could call this post Karma is a Bitch, or What Goes Around Comes Around, or simply HAHAHAHAHA.

I don't know where to start. But it is just too funny. So I'll start at the begining. I can't tell you how big my smile is right now.

Last night partner calls late. He wants to come up. Late, but ok I can always burn one more. The second I say sure, he is in my driveway. Wow. That was fast.

He comes in with middle daughter. He has a big smile on and tells daughter to tell me what she saw.

She was waiting to get in to our only upcountry bar with live music. Fat Fredie and Stevie were selling their wares across the street. A blue car hops the curb and hits Fat Fredy. Three animals get out and pound Stevie. Take his backpack and hop back into the car.

This is the part where they should bail, but there tough, so they get out and start calling out the people waiting to get in, to fight.

Then the cops show up. Sucks to be the goons. Stevie and Fat Fredy are hospital bound. The animals are going to the zoo where they belong.

Let me cut here.

There are three cops covering the entire upcountry area. About 150 sq miles. I have waited hours for them to show up.

The cop shop is 4 blocks from the bar. They are NEVER there. Until yesterday. When all three were there. Aloha boys. Took them two minutes to get on scene. Thank you Jesus. And (I never thought I'd say this ) thank you MPD.

And once again it just gets better.

Partner takes off. I can't sleep. Hell, I can't stop laughing. What morons. They build them big but not very smart.

My landline rings. Huh? Nobody has that number. Pick it up and it is a voice from the past. I'll call him Jeff. He was my room mate when I lived on Oahu, I did his father a couple of favors almost 30 years ago. Basicly it was my job to find Jeff after he passed out and get him safely home. His father wants to talk to me.

OK, If you look up weight in the dictionary this mans picture will be there. He is old school. Very old school. And he ain't happy. Do I know anything about blank?

Oh Baby! Fuck yes. I tell all. Hotel, sale, Rip offs , cops, EVERYTHING. He now has some serious fence mending to do. They used his name and he is not happy. When I tell him about the bust that cheers him up. A little.

Them he asks if I'm back in bussiness. You do not lie to this guy, because he knows the answer before he asks the question. I say "yes", he says "I'd like to take a look at it".

"Are you CRAZY? I just dealt with the goons. Fuck That Noise". He lets me vent for a minute, and says "I'll send Jeff. Alone, No Goons, And you can bring your muscle".

Then it hits me. The only time I have ever used "muscle" was at the hotel a few days ago. He knows what happened. Everything. I'm sure of it.

I tell him don't need muscle, but the deal happens on the spot of my choosing. He says fine. Be in at 9 AM. Today.

I have no idea how this will workout.

It may just be a real good day. Hell its already a good day, maybe it will be a great day.

[weeddaddy50]

at 9:00 am.........You got me.......lets here the details.:stoned:

[oldhaole]

at 9:00 am.........You got me.......lets here the details.:stoned:

Details? Where do I start?

Part of me is disgusted, Part of me is estatic. Part of me is blown away. Part of me is pissed. Part of me is torn. All of me is tired.

The deal went fine. Like selling a quarter oz. Only this qt cost north of 65 grand. Then we went golfing....not what you expected huh?

The gulch is done. Wifeys are done. And by done I mean out the door. Pau. Pay the man.

Jeff came right up to the house. No sense hide. He knows where I live anyway, or could find out easily. Just him, looks at the product, ask if it is all as good, test a few samples randomly, and says, "I want everything".

And that is redemption. The Holy Grail for growers.

When you do this, it is almost in a bubble. You have your trip going, but you don't see the competition, all you see is what is in front of you. Sure, you get stoned, but how does it match up? Has the whole rest of the island grown a better quality than me? Where do I stand?

"I want everything. How much you got?"

Bingo. I know I did good. He took three samples. And he just bought 22 lbs.
Hello Mr Franklin. Took about 30 minutes.

Jeff leaves a big stack on the table, says he has a tee time in two hours. Wana play? "Go take care of that" he says as points at the cash, meet me at Kahili top in two hours.

The top course is private. Costs like $50,000 to be a member. I play the bottom with all the other commoners, and drool at the top course. Today is one long orgasm. I wanted to play that course in the worst way.

Show up, and it's like I'm swarmed. "Wash your clubs?, would you like a massage before you hit some balls, or would you like to just go out."

My shit don't stink today. Jeff says what do you want....Oh God I just came.
The massuse was a babe. And if she was just a massuse my name is Meyer. Talk about a happy ending....I can't go there....I just can't...God, I want to cry.

I gotta get out of here, lets go play...I stunk...my mind was elsewhere.

We had a blast. Just catching up, takling story, but nothing about the last week.

As we finish Jeff says Pops wants me to stop by and say hello. O.K. He also tells me the main guy in this little rip off ring has a daddy that is a big shot, and he will be there....WTF??? The goons go down, and the boss walks? You're shittin me? I will go say hi to Pops, then I'm gone.

I go in, Say hello to Pops....And I am door bound. This stinks. Then Pops asks the thief; "Tell us the story how you paid $4500 for an lb and let this skinny haole get away". The dude is sour. They had been ragging him for a while. He looks at me and says "I should have hit your house"

Jeff starts laughing. " You scared of dogs? He has a tribe." more laughing.

By now I'm getting a bit more than pissed. This asshole skates back to daddy and his "friends" are in jail. This blows. I can't say anything. He's eating steak, and his friends are eating shit. I am so out of here.

On the way out, Jeff tells me they will take everything I have. Anytime. Their testers were very happy with it. Sorry Jeff, I'm sold out. Maybe next year.

As soon as I got home I took a shower. Wash that stench away.

The garage is empty. Spare bedroom almost. Attic is full of the best of the best. I still have 10-12 lbs that I will give away. Maybe more.

And I do mean give. From this point on everything is free. Like them apples? I got mine, the house got its. My patients got there's. You have a valid Hawaii Blue card? State ID? Come get yours. I can't legaly sell it but I can gift it all away. PM me. Offer open for 2 weeks or two lbs, whichever comes first.

Put a fork in it, I am Done. It has been one hell of a ride. I'm almost sorry its over.

I just took you thru my season, beginning to end. Seeds to sale. The full monty.

Hope you had as much fun, but not as much drama, as I did.

Later

Once more to cover my ass;

This is a work of fiction. Any similarities to any person, living or dead, is purely coincidental...... Except the free weed. Come and get it.

[Weezard]

I'm sure you've seen the original "Magic Christian movie, Yah?
Well, brace yourself.

"If you want it, come ahead and get it, but you better hurry 'cause it's going fast"

I am , , more than entertained.
I am touched.
Mahalo.

Weeze

[weeddaddy50]

excellantie......love it......I only hope my harvest that is 14 days away....is as successful as 50% of yours......thanks for the time you spent posting all there was to your excellent season.

Weeddaddy

[oldhaole]

There you go man.
Keep as cool as you can.
Face miles of trials with smiles.
It riles them to believe, that you percieve, the web they weave.
And keep on thinking free.

Weeddaddy....Two weeks? Now it gets fun huh? I wish you the best.

If you are comming here for a story, the story is done.

Nothing to see here.... move along....

This is my final post in this log. Party is over, last one turn out, turn off the lights.

At this point I am pretty full of myself. That needs to be fixed. So I must end this with my fuck ups.

My wife kicked my ass...there, I said it. She does not know and can not find out. Her 7 yielded more than mine. She went with all regrows, and I was dicking around with the Cali strain in a couple of holes.

My timing was off. I should have planted the cali girls two weeks later. Two of them were great, size wise, but the mold...you got to stay on top of that. The rest were pathetic. Great weed, tiny yield. Dead hole.

Paranoia = waste. Somebody said here about to take one of these, you need two guys and a u haul. That's true. I was one paranoid bastard... for nothing.

The harvest was ugly. Started great, then came apart like a cheap watch. One of my patients is still in the wind. The other saved my ass. Shit. she'll read this...She's also greedy and stupid for getting on a plane. Then comming back and sponging off of me for the rest of the year.

I had four holes that yielded two ozs each. That's embarassing. All on top. The top sucked. Got three good plants out of there. Wrong sun, junk soil, big rocks.

I left 15 lbs behind by going with patients Cali strains. But, I love the stuff. Grown here it is A +. My sativa strains are a solid B. But it yields 4 times the indica. Just for kicks, do you think I let Jeff see any of that? Nope.

This grow went 8 months. It's done To everybody that followed this I Thank You.

There's an offer a post or two back. It's for real.

Fade to black.

Later

OH

[Horsemanrocks]

The word on the street is that youâ??re a very generous guy (sez the big I guy)â?¦.I wonâ??t get to the islands in time to enjoy your most recent giftsâ?¦..but I think that at some point we should â??beat the ballâ?� at least once. Iâ??d expect a generous guy like yourself to tell me to â??pick it upâ?� anywhere inside of sayâ?¦.6 feet ?? Thatâ??s what I call a happy ending.

Horsemanhacks.