Advice?

[BKost82]

I really need some advice from some people that won't judge me for smoking so.. Thought this would be a good place to come. Would really appreciate it if someone could read this whole thing and give me some feedback.

I've been fighting with my mom ever since a home drug test she
bought came back positive for thc. When she saw that, she
jumped to all sorts of conclusions. The biggest two are that
I'm not going to have a future and am going to get into a car
accident. This was on 4/18. Two days later, it's 4/20, and
also senior skip day. So I skipped, but I didn't get to even
smoke that day. Shitty 4/20 right? My douchebag friends were
broke, the few that had jobs bailed, and I don't get paid
until thursday. So for the day, I actually decided to work on
my english report, but not go back to school. Going back to
school is a late detention, and staying out for the day is
just an abscense.

Anyway, the automated phone call thing at my school called my
parents to inform them that "your son has missed one or more
classes today". I thought that thing wouldn't work anymore
once we dropped our home phone, but I guess the school
switched it to my mom's cell. My mom has no idea what 4/20
is, but she does know what senior skip day is. She just
assumed I was off smoking all day, which IS what I intended to
do. I can't be mad at her for saying that. But then she goes
on about the "no future" shit again, and I'm just trying to
tune her out. I know I have a plan for my future, and I've
told it to her. I'm going get out of high school and go to
college, but she seems to think that skipping a day of school
is going to fuck everything up. But I don't think she is that
stupid, I think she knows one day doesn't matter much, I think
she is more concerned that I'm on a slipery slope. I don't
think I am, I have my life in order, other than my family
life.

The fights are bigger than just about the drug test and the
skipping. She brings up the "no future" shit in any fight we
have, and we fight alot. I blame alot of it on my dad, I
think he is the reason I smoke. He creates alot of stress in
my house because he causes fights at the drop of a hat. We
all have to tip toe around him so that we don't start a huge
fight over whatever he feels like bitching about today. I
think I'm really angry because of the fights I have with him,
and I think I misdirect that anger at my mom some times. I
also feel like my mom some times instigates fights without
thinking about it.

My mom just came and told me "no one has ever hurt her more
than I have in the past few days". I'm not sure if she is
being overdramatic or not. Considering all of the stuff my
dad has done, I kind of find it hard to beleive. But then
again, she did give up alot of her life for me, and she says
she feels like I "slapped her in the face". But I know I
didn't. She takes it personally when I don't follow her
rules, which I think is just crazy... I'm 18, of course I'm
not going to follow all of her rules. I'm not willing to
sacrafice my principles either, because I strongly beleive
marijuana laws are unjust, and I'm not going to follow them.
When an unjust law is that easy to evade, why WOULD you follow
it?

I can understand why she'd be mad that I skipped school,
because she thinks trust is really important, and she takes it
as "i lied to her". Yeah, I did, but I don't think it's a big
deal. When your living with someone who has a lot of control
over you, the only way to really cope is to lie sometimes imo.
Her and my dad both also bring up respect alot. My dad just
doesn't deserve respect... As immature as that might sound, I
don't feel he does. I do respect and love my mom, but I can't
follow all of her rules. I aprecciate everything she's done
for me, but sometimes, I just can't deal with her.
So what I really want to know, is how can I show my mom I do
have a future? How can I make her realize I respect her? How
can I just generally improve my family life? And the hardest
one that I really don't think is possible, but I'll ask
anyway, how can I get her to accept that I smoke weed?

BKost82 Reviewed by BKost82 on 04-21-2009. Advice? I really need some advice from some people that won't judge me for smoking so.. Thought this would be a good place to come. Would really appreciate it if someone could read this whole thing and give me some feedback. I've been fighting with my mom ever since a home drug test she bought came back positive for thc. When she saw that, she jumped to all sorts of conclusions. The biggest two are that I'm not going to have a future and am going to get into a car accident. This was on Rating: 5

[apocolips31]

Hmmm, thats a little tough there. Well you could try to do what I did with my mom, which was to show her all the TRUE facts pertaining to cannabis. I also showed her very succesful people that smoke all the time. Like the guy that made the apple computer. My mom smoked before so she knew it wasn't the "devil" but, she still sourta beleived the stigma that the government gives you that it is a gate way drug or it makes you lazy. I just do my best to show my mom that thier is no stereo type for a pot smoker, as we cross all bounderies and parts of life.

[killerweed420]

Exactly. Using other people that are successful and smoke pot is a good rebuttle. Try and be smart and out smart her by using real evidence, not fairy tales.
Obama smoked pot,Bush did pot and coke,(probably not a good example.lol) Virtually every actor,actress or musician has smoked. Ther are a lot of rich people that have. Just google and see what you come up with. Print it out and have an honest debate with your parents, and remain calm the whole time. There's no proof that pot does anything negative except for societies twisted laws about cannabis. And when you debate don't use the word pot or weed, use cannabis. It sounds more medical and has less bad connotations than the other words.
Every kid that feels positive about pot should take a debate class in school, so you can articulate your feelings on the issue should it ever come up.

[TyPR124]

Well, I'm actually in a similar situation. My parents recently found out I smoke. My dad hasn't really said anything about, so I don't know whether he's mad or not (he used to be a dealer, so there's a chance he knows the facts), but my mom is pissed. She keeps sticking to the point that it is a gateway drug, and that "if you're stupid enough to smoke pot then your stupid enough to do other drugs" which is absolutely not true. In fact I don't even drink (I did at one point but I decided it really is dumb and only causes problems.) I'm NEVER touching other drugs that can really be addicting (never smoked a cigarrette in my life, even when ALL my friends did, because I know they are addicting.)

The biggest problem I have is that my mom is VERY bullheaded. She always thinks she's right no matter what. She says she smoked before and didn't like it (made her paranoid and sick). But she doesn't seem to understand that its her OPINION. Yet she drinks nearly every day she has off work, and smokes also.

I just finished typing a report that I'm going to print soon and show it to her. We did a huge report in English class, and I took all the requirements and changed the subject to marijuana vs alcohol (and partially tobacco). Its 4 pages long (double spaced, 12 pt font). Its got all the sources listed (which all happen to be either .org, .edu, or .gov, except for the Washington Post, MSNBC, and CBS)

[filo6942]

Uhmmm you should start saving your money so you can move out and be a big boy just like you want. You won't have to listen to your parents ever again and you can do anything you want! Heck why even go to school anymore if you dont want to?

OR you could respect your parents and do what you are told. Do you pay rent? Pay the bills? Whos house is it? Don't bite the hand that feeds you...

[apocolips31]

filo, that wasn't part of the question at all. It is the principle of the matter. If someone is wrong, they are wrong.

[JaggedEdge]

I never had that problem. I would suggest quitting until you leave for college, move out, and smoke as much as you like then. Luckily for me, my mom never found out I smoked, she may know now, but I'm 23 and nearly out of college. Granted if I didn't get high so much I probably could have finished school in 4 years, but I blame having to work along with being a full-time student as much as I blame my many vices.

My mom did the same shit yours does, hell mine still does. I would suggest telling her this. Look, I understand your worried about me, but I need to make my own decisions. Find some literature on the subject and ask her to read it. If she still opposes agree to quit smoking while you live under her roof than move out.

Your old enough now and you only have a month or so of school left. At least I'm assuming since your 18 and had a skip day your a senior.