If you have been smoking cigs and drinking, props for quiting that shit. Were you trying to kill urself cause you picked the right shit if soo. Ok...try this...leave EVERY vice out of the mix for at least another week and try to get your body clean. Primarily nicotein and caffein. Drink plenty of pure water throughout every day and try to purge yourself of all stresses the best you can as Zihowie and maryjane said. When you have reached your ready point, you will know. Once you have, emurse yourself in a very very relaxed situation either with friends(not the "amped" fuckers) or alone. When things are feeling very natural and fluid, not planned or scripted, bust out a heavy Sativa and take only one toke. This last part is vital because your tolerance will have dropped and you sure don't want to prompt a "tripout". If this goes well then you have your answers.....stress and anxiety. With having 28yrs of dealing with severe anxiety and bipolar disorder, I am leaning towards the stress and anxiety. But also be prepared for an answer you won't at all like. We all know that for many cannabis can bridge a gap in our brain chemistry but could also make a short-cut path for effects not helpful to some. We are all pulling for ya and hope ya get it worked out....I can't imagine what it would feel like if the miracle effects she gives me turned into ill-effects.