Starting to lose it

[DaBudhaStank]

So here we go, another "I need help" thread. I'll try to make this quick.

I went to college in NY for my first year last fall. I did very poorly because I skipped way too many classes and didn't buy all the necessary books. After that me and the folks decided it'd be best if I went to community college to get some credits and see about transferring to a local state college. Well, I've been doing that since the beginning of September. Unfortunately, I got fired from my job literally 2 weeks before the start of school. I worked at a Navy Exchange on the base near me, which is basically a standard department store like Sears. I used to snag a soda and a bag of chips or something when I was working to have a snack during lunch. Basically I did this every day I was at work, while I worked full time 40 hours a week. Yeah, I know, It was wrong blah blah blah I could have just paid for it. All well in good. Except that they charged me $400 dollars to pay off the goods (when it was closer to half that) then charged me another $200 as a civil recovery suit. So basically all the money I saved up working there for 3 months was gone immediately. I still owe them $100.

So, obviously I didn't have the cash for books for school, putting me at a huge disadvantage. I never told my parents because there's absolutely no good that can come from it. After that shit went even more downhill. I ended up doing my stupid standard thing and skipping classes. This caused me to fail one class outright and to be dropped from another, so I'm in 3 out of 5 that I was taking. So I figured I'd just try to do what I could. But, having no books and no money made it almost impossible. Now I can't even seem to care anymore and I rarely go to class, seeing as it's been practically impossible to pass from the get go. Grades come out in a month and thats when shit is really gonna hit the fan, when my parents find out.

So, I guess my question is; what the FUCK do I do now? The only thing I can think of is start saving up as much money as I can until then, pay off whatever debts remain to me, and then move out. I guess I'll try to pay them back for school since I fucked up, but thats still $1500 dollars. Then I'll have to find a place to live and a car to drive. All in all, I have no idea what to do anymore.

And just in case anyone feels like rubbing it in, yeah, I know I fucked myself mostly, so theres no need to point it out.

DaBudhaStank Reviewed by DaBudhaStank on 11-21-2008. Starting to lose it So here we go, another "I need help" thread. I'll try to make this quick. I went to college in NY for my first year last fall. I did very poorly because I skipped way too many classes and didn't buy all the necessary books. After that me and the folks decided it'd be best if I went to community college to get some credits and see about transferring to a local state college. Well, I've been doing that since the beginning of September. Unfortunately, I got fired from my job literally 2 weeks Rating: 5

[JohnnyZ]

It could be worse dude. You should just be honest with your parents right now. Stop putting it off. Take some time off from school if you need it. Find out what you actually want to do in life. I had a similar problem this year, I was in commerce and I hated every class. Couldn't focus cause I had no interest in the course material. So I decided to drop all my business classes this term and restart next term in education. I'll be a phys ed teacher in 2.5 years. Dream job for me dude, cause I'm not all about the money. I'm a believer in all you need is love.

It'll all work out as it should.

[Puffzter]

Yeah,
I would tell them more or less exactly what you just wrote to us. If nothing else I can assure you you will feel better and you parents will come down on you at least a bit softer than if you keep it from them until the very last second.
Tough to do but better than not to.

Puffzter

[thcbongman]

Seems like tough times for a lot of people.

You dug yourself in a hole because you put off the problem. Been there, done that. You shouldn't ignore these issues, because you made a mountain out of an ant hill. Come clean with your parents and work to pay off that debt asap. The longer you let it stray, the worse your debt will be and the worse your problems will be. You don't want to get into serious debt, my best friend is still paying off debt for classes he messed up in and chose to ignore until it was too late. Don't become another victim.

[mjmomma]

I believe that your parents will find out eventually, and it would be better if the information came directly from you.

Now: as a momma: I have to say this:
GET YOUR ASS TO CLASS!!!!!!!

(and then a big hug )

College isn't simple by any means, but it sure is a lot easier than at working fast food places.

Good luck with your studies and also with your family: I'll bet you'll find them to be a lot more understanding than you're giving them credit for.

[dragonrider]

I'd say you probably should come clean about it sooner, rather than later. You might also want to look into wether or not you can officially WITHDRAW from these classes now, before the end of the semester, rather than just fail them and have to drag those F's around on your transcript for the rest of your college career. Also, you might want to get started on a PLAN for how you are not going to fuck up next semester. If you withdraw now, maybe you can get a full-time job, and have enough cash by next semester to pay off the job you stole from, pay your parents back or pay for your own tuition next semester, and pay for your books.

Lessons learned:

• Don't steal from your employer.
  
• Always buy all the books for your classes.
  
• Don't skip class.
  
• If you fall behind in a class, withdraw from it, and devote your energy to the other ones. In college, you can almost never "catch up" once you fall behind.

[HRPufnstuf]

Yep, life is what you make it, man. I think everybody's giving you good advice. The best thing to do is often the hardest. Having said that though, you have to make the decision based on information you have that others don't; you know your parents.

I can only say that if it were me in the parent's postition I'd appreciate the honesty and would lend help where I could even if only helping to chart a plan to get things fixed and to get you back on track.

Good luck

[zihowie]

Figure out what makes you happy and set your goals to achieve that. Ive found that going to school for something that will make me good money only leads me to getting bored and tired of the material.

Find something if nothing you already like and set the goal to be the best. Be determined and except nothing less and you will/can do it!:thumbsup:

[sportbiker]

I think you should talk to your school and see if they'll let you drop this semester. They don't want a failing student mucking up their grades, and you have a somewhat decent reason for what happened. (I had a fairly legitimate one, I had a rough year financially and had to take on a second 20hr a week job on top of my 40hr a week job - they let me drop the classes with the agreement that I would retake them the next semester)

If your parents are decent to live with, stay with them. Admit you fscked up and want to try to start fresh next semester. In the long run you'll end up better off than trying to move out now and failing in 6 months with a bunch of 'real' debt.