ET-101 Manual -The Intergalatic one you forgot

[Dream of the iris]

Morale Boosting
Mission Control is aware that many of you are very weary and discouraged with this mission. From your current perception, we know it looks pretty bleak down there. To watch world systems in decay, ambulatory insanity at the helm, denial on a rampage, human*ity down each otherâ??s throats, and a dying biosphere is probably not your idea of a good time.
Try to remember that though you may be vastly outnumbered on this planet, you belong to a greater family that is by far in the majority of the remainder of the universe. Align with your heritage, remember your birthright, and be certain of your destiny. You are children of the stars, sired by light, and your reality is the superior one. The damage and corruption you see around you is just the ending choreography of the old worldâ??s last dance, and the promised reclamation of this planet is but the final manifestation of a campaign that has already been won.

Curing Battle Fatigue
The best cure for battle fatigue is not to battle. Although you may find it difficult not to inject a little sanity into the lemming-like rush towards death you see all around you, do not intercede. The old world is dying. It must and will come down. The best you can do is allow it to die as gracefully as possible.
Whatever you put your attention on increases. For the sake of the ecosystem and the new emerging civilization, remove your atten*tion from the death process and place it on the process of birth in*stead. Misplaced attention will just act to prolong the endingâ??s agony delay your inevitable, exalted future.

The Special Forces
Because we do not have a millenium to spare, Mission Control has not left the process of reawakening solely in your hands. Alliances, commands, and transition teams have been sent in to facilitate your awakening and help snap you out of your coma. Please be on the lookout for these energies.
You will be able to identify the Special Forces primarily by your inner response to them which was pre-encoded into your DNA struc*ture before you left. No matter how â?�rationalâ?� you believe yourself to be, you will find yourself strangely interested in the unbelievable things they are saying without knowing why.
The Special Forces are distinguishable from Earth-based organi*zations in that they do not lie, are not wimpy, and donâ??t want fol*lowers. They will not allow you to use them to replace worn-out, fear-based, disempowering religious belief systems. They will insist on your sovereignty, refuse to be outside authorities, and will not allow you to dump your responsibility or power at their feet. Their purpose is clear and simple: They are here to assist you into your full presence so they can then aid in co-creating a new reality with their peers.
Another characteristic feature of the Special Forces is a well developed sense of humor, also distinguishing them from most Earth-based â?�spiritualâ?� groups. These Forces may be facilitated by walk-ins. They may use art forms, such as dance, interdimensional languages translated into tones, or whatever else they can get their hands on to circumvent your linear, two-dimensional linguistic systems. They are experts in the transmutative process and use other dimensional tech*nologies to break through dysfunctional patterning.
Mission Controlâ??s primary goal is to successfully complete this mission with as little loss as possible. Please do not ignore the Special Forces that were sent in for your benefit. They are the Green Berets of this mission.

Interdimensional Brain Surgery
Do not be alarmed by the subject of this article. The only dimen*sion on which brain surgery is dangerous is the third. Every other dimension (not counting the first, second, and fourth) has it down pat, and malpractice suits are virtually unheard of. Interdimensional brain surgery is another form of assistance we offer you.
This surgical procedure enables us to reroute dysfunctional brain patterns, rewire circuitry that has shorted due to deranged thought *form overloads, cure all computer viruses that your brain may have contracted, and replace existing fuses with heavier equipment to in*sure that everything doesnâ??t blow out when all the lights come on.
To operate, however, we need your permission on one level or another â?? conscious permission preferred. Even your medical profession has gotten that far, usually having you sign a release before they nearly or actually kill you. The difference in our request is that it is not motivated by a desire to stay out of court but by our total respect for your sovereignty.
For those of you who are reluctant on any level to give your per*mission to go under the knife, you may be relieved to know that we donâ??t use knives. It may also be helpful to know that we havenâ??t lost a patient yet. Mission Control awaits your decision.

Exploratory Emotional Body Surgery
Unlike interdimensional brain surgery, you do have reason to be alarmed by the subject of this article. In answer to your question, â??Will it hurt?â?� the answer is â?�Yes!â?? This surgical procedure requires conscious participation and cannot be done under anaesthetics. In fact, many of you will have to come out of the anaesthetics you are currently under in order to participate.
If you enjoy going where no man or woman has gone before and are not put off by a sloggy journey through your own internal swamp, this surgery will present little or no problem. However, if you are squeamish about traveling over darkened and repulsive terrain, we suggest you toughen up, because there is no way around this one. Lightness and darkness cannot coexist in the same place at the same time.
Although emotional surgery requires some bravery, Mission Control would like to remind you that no one in their right mind would have signed up for this particular mission if they did not have any courage. The fact is, the only thing more painful than going through this procedure is not going through it. Our surgical staff is at your disposal and ready to assist you through this process.

Creative License
If you do not already have a Creative License, we suggest you apply for one immediately. We assure you it will come in very handy as you try to accomplish what it is you came here to do.
When you send in your application, be sure to indicate the level of creation you feel you are capable of handling. Once your applica*tion is received, Mission Control will check its own files to see if the class of license you have applied for matches our data concerning the creative skills you can manage. Even though Mission Control already knows the answer, we ask for your self appraisal just to check your understanding of your role in the co-creative process.
In most cases, the class of license you request will be well below the level you can handle, in which event you will be issued a Learnerâ??s Permit. Please do not be insulted if this is what you receive. It is tem*porary and will be replaced by your real license as soon as you fully awaken to your creative capacity. The Learnerâ??s Permit is simply a safety precaution. A full-fledged creative License requires total con*scious control of the reality you are designing. It also grants you â?�drivingâ?� privileges outside your dimension. Unfortunately, losing control of your vehicle interdimensionally can cause an even worse traffic hazard than it does within the relatively safe confines of your planet.
Although you will not be asked to take a written exam, a heart! mind coordination test is a must. This mandatory examination will be administered to you on another dimension by our DMV staff. Also, when applying for your Creative License, you need not indicate whether you wear glasses, contacts, or are legally blind. Just tell us if you can see; thatâ??s all we want to know.
When you apply for your license, please remember to include $9of your adult play money to cover our presence on this plane and the printing expenses we have incurred since our arrival. (This is a
one-time fee. Once a license is issued, there will be no need for a renewal.) Please make your check or money order payable to â??The Intergalactic Councilâ?� and send it to the following address, attention of the Department of Manifestation and Vision (DMV).

MISSION CONTROL
P0 Box 2066
Pagosa Springs, Colorado 81147
USA



Recent Legislation
Since time is almost over (and without it, itâ??s impossible to live out your lives on the old â?�go now, pay laterâ?� plan), the Stellar Coun*cils have unanimously voted to repeal the Law of Karma. This came about because Mission Control brought it to the Councilsâ?? attention that there wasnâ??t enough physical time left to fulfill the Law of Kar*maâ??s requirements and still meet our transmutative deadline. As a result, the Councils decided that it was easier to get rid of the whole thing than it was to figure out a way to meet its demands. Another reason the Councils were moved to this decision is that the Akashic Records are just about full. The thought of having to add on another wing and increase its library staff was more than the participating Councils cared to address at this time. They felt they had more press*ing projects to invest in during this fiscal millennium.
As a result of these factors and the additional fact that it is vir*tually impossible for anyone to be a master and a student at the same time, the Councils have not only rescinded the law governing the karmic educational system, but have also unanimously voted to enact the Law of Grace. Consequently, all debits have been removed from the cosmic records and you are free to move forward with no reference to any debts you may have incurred. You are also free to stop pretending that you are a student. This legislation makes it easier all around and has sent a sigh of relief throughout the Intergalactic Councilâ??s administrative staff â?? especially the Justice Department and the Interdimensional Retribution Service. It should likewise send a sigh of relief through you.
Mission Control repeats this important bit of news: The Law of Karma has been repealed and the Law of Grace enacted to assist you in your manifestation of divinity. All debts have been forgiven and all court dates canceled. You are free to proceed outside the juris*diction of karma and in the state of grace. The blessings of all the Councils go with you.

[Dream of the iris]

Self-Help Techniques
The greatest self-help technique you can practice is the art of laughing. This is not to say that everything that is coming down is entirely funny. For instance, you may find it difficult, at first, to get a chuckle out of a rapidly disappearing ozone layer and the petro*chemicals you are drinking with every glass of water. And, to be perfectly honest, even we donâ??t find the Federal Reserve very amus*ing. However, getting depressed is not an answer.
This is the most critical moment of change in this planetâ??s his*tory and your assistance in that change is vital. Humor has the ef*fect of raising your vibratory level, and you wonâ??t believe how high it has got to go to get through this one. Going catatonic over the seriousness of the global situation will not only not help the globe, but it will also effectively knock you out of the ballgame. Our ad*vice? Keep laughing.
Another practice you will find invaluable is owning up to your creative capacity. Your reality is formed by your attention, and it is entirely your choice if you end up as a second-rate actor in a B movie instead of a star on the star that is about to be born. It is also advisable to keep in mind that you are here on assignment. Please donâ??t get sidetracked into thinking you have cancer just because you have visited the ward. Remember who you are and what you are doing and keep your eyes on the stars.

The Great Awakening
The 1990s are the decade of The Great Awakening. By comparison, the â??90s are destined to make the â??6Os look like little more than an episode out of â?�Leave it to Beaver:â?? In this decade, the second wave of extraterrestrials will remember who they are.
This newly awakening group constitutes the majority of the beings on this planet who are carrying within their genetic structure the seeds of a new consciousness. This tide of consciousness is an unstoppable force, and its impact is destined to sweep across and shape the shores of the incoming millenium. The Great Awakening is a manifestation of the Victory of Light that has already been accomplished beyond this plane and now has only to play itself out on this dimension.
The greatest help you will receive on this mission will happen through this awakening of your fellow members. The escalation of transmutational energy caused by this awakening will irreversibly tip the global scales in the direction of spiritual realignment. This vibrational escalation will be a demonstration of a very sophisticated, extraterrestrial concept which we call multidimensional marketing. During these times, please be generous and loving in your assistance to those around you. They are most likely your down-line.

Starseed â?? The Next Generation
Another great source of assistance on this mission will be ex*tended to you by the generation that follows. This manual is primarily directed at the vanguard of this mission whose task is to cut the pathway to a new civilization. However, the generation that you have prepared the way for is right behind you. They are the builders of the civilization for which you now establish the foundation.
We have noticed that your current civilization has been alarmed by this generation, as they have begun to make mincemeat out of your standardized tests of measurement. Many of them are logging remarkably low scores on your intelligence tests, such as the SAT examination. They are also having a field day with your psychological tests for normalcy, such as the Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Inventory. May we suggest that the Minnesota Multiphasic has never been adequate to measure anyone outside of Minnesota, and it is even more inadequate in measuring an extraterrestrial who may have an alarming predisposition towards androgyny and other psycho*logically suspect behavior. This starseed group is equipped differently and is basically bored by the questionable standards of intelligence and dysfunctionality posing as mental health that you are submit*ting them to.. And it may be time to scrap the outdated exams that only assess their response to slavery.
Just as you are great masters of consciousness, so are they. Their task is slightly different, but they will support you in yours as they await their moment to make their presence known. Treat these masters well. They are the seeds that are to bear the fruit of your ecstatic destiny.It would actually be more appropriate to measure this generation with a Richter scale if you were truly interested in under*standing who they are.

Audio-Visual Aids
The Intergalactic Council is in the process of considering its forthcoming line of interdimensional paraphernalia to assist into your real identity. If you are already there, none of these audio-visual aids
will be necessary. However, if you are still in transition, you may find their â?�fall lineâ?� useful, If you wish to be on the Councilâ??s mailing list, please send your name and address to us at the address listed in this section under â?�Creative License:â?? (Be sure to indicate that you are interested in the Councilâ??s E.T. Designer Line so that we donâ??t mistakenly issue you an unrequested permit on license.)

4.

Note: If you have applied for a Creative License or have filled out your ad*dress and sent in our census information at the back of the manual, you will automatically be placed on this mailing list unless you indicate otherwise.


Monitoring
This entry is not for your assistance; it is for ours. Some of our technicians have lodged a complaint and requested that we place it in this manual. As mentioned elsewhere, all members of this mission are under constant surveillance by our monitoring staff. In many cases, this has gotten to be quite a bore, and some of our personnel are having trouble staying awake at their panels. They are wondering whether you have forgotten why you are on this planet and would appreciate a little more activity in conjunction with the mission. So, for their sake as well as the planetâ??s, will you please step on it? Their job description does not include monitoring an entire squadron that is asleep at the wheel.




A FORMAL INVITATION

Mission Control
respectfully
requests
your presence
at
a come-as-you-are party
RSVP
*

We know that this mission is not easy. We also know that many tears have been shed in the awesome process of its spiritual unfoldment. Be consoled in knowing that all tears are soon to be wiped from your eyes and all your pain dismissed and forgotten. The glory and joy of what is about to transpire will render all you have endured a minor expense, a price you would be more than willing to pay again.
You are all cordially invited to attend the birthday celebra*tion that marks this missionâ??s successful end. This celebration will put all the combined feasts of every earthly head of state to shame. Such feasts will seem pathetic gestures compared to the party that Spirit is about to throw in your name. The revelation of the nature of your presence on this plane will soon be announced. You will be known as the honored guests of the Spirit you came to serve, a disclosure that will lend an entirely new meaning to the saying â?�a star-studded cast.â?�
The dress code is simple but mandatory. You must come clothed in your full presence, dressed in the spiritual light of the Lords that you are. Clothe yourselves in the finery that befits Spiritâ??s messengers to this plane. Come out of your hiding and come fully attired as the distinguished members of Spiritâ??s divine delivery system of the stars. Come, in short, as you truly are.
We bless you all for your courage and your commitment and we honor you for your accomplishments on this plane. Take heart in the knowledge that your task is almost over. This carbon-based planet will shortly burst into a diamond, a gem in the crown of this solar systemâ??s skies. The celebration will then begin.

This is Mission Control
Over and out
[10.]

[Dream of the iris]

THE EXTRATERRESTRIAL CENSUS

Because the number of entities that comprise this mission is vast, and many have entered this plane representing a myriad of alliances, commands, councils, and federations, we have decided to run a census. Although we usually run a census every other millenium whether we need it or not, this particular census is of special significance to us. That is because, due to the mission, there are many more extraterrestrials here than usual. There is also some importance attached to this census because the Councilâ??s statistics have become confused by the fact that many mission members are part of group soul endeavors which have splintered onto this plane for the occasion. Our records count these members as one. (The fact is, that is how we count the entire mission, no matter which planet, galaxy, or dimension you may be from or which alliance federation you are affiliated with.)
Counting the whole thing as one, or a group soul project as one, is fine on the fifth dimension but is causing us a bit of a traffic jam on the third, where some of our â?�onesâ?� are now numbering over five million. Just to straighten this matter out, we are asking that you voluntarily turn yourselves in. Although our statistics will never add up to a count above one, it is a matter of both interest and tidiness to know where our mission fragments are located and how they think they are doing.
Beyond satisfying these superficial third-dimensional concerns, this census is actually being taken for your benefit. Your incoming data will be used to energetically bind you in your awareness of each other on this plane. We, in truth, donâ??t need a count to know who you are, where you are, and what youâ??re up to. (Put another way: We know if youâ??ve been sleeping. We know if youâ??re awake. We know if youâ??ve been bad or good, etc.)
â?? The Intergalactic Council
[11.]
END


Written by Diana Luppi


For some this will resonate with truth more then others, but like I said, don't take it so seriously. The message is all that's important. It's a humorous take on our current situation in regards to where we are going in "the spirit of Douglas Adams".

[theforthdrive]

LOL... is there a abridged version? i have no attention span!

[Dream of the iris]

Sorry, no abridged version. It's an interesting read, though.