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10-07-2008, 07:03 PM #1
OPSenior Member
Told My Wife Yesterday That I Burn
I don't mind you asking at all. It's a long answer though. I apologize.
I'm definitely still a Christian. I would never raise my children to be Southern Baptist though. But Christian? Yes, I would tell them about Christ and all that. (Of course I can't make the faith decision for them, and I wouldn't try to force anything on them... but I would of course tell them about my faith)
I became a Christian before I became a Southern Baptist. So in some ways I never really fit the Southern Baptist mold anyway. I only started going to a SB church when my parents moved me to the Southeast in high school. After that I got sucked into it. I was young and stupid I guess.
I have different reasons as to why I became a Christian and as to why I remain a Christian. I'll give the reasons for both.
The main reason I became a Christian has to do with an experience I had as a young man. At 13 years old I ran away to a Dead show in Miami. A guy walks up to me and says he's got some liquid drugs in this eye dropper type bottle. Offers me some. There's drugs everywhere, so I"m like... sure. He puts a drop or two on the back of my hand and he says "whatever you do, do NOT lick this shit." So of course, being a dumb ass 13 year old... he walks away and I lap it all up like a dog licking a puddle of steak drippings.
I know this forum is not for discussing other drugs, but this is part of the answer to your question so I'll just try to keep it brief. Let's not discuss this aspect (if we can help). I'll just say I was gone for a fucking year. The hallucinations stopped after a day or so, but I heard voices for a year. I had never heard them before that, but afterward I had voices basically controlling me. They would "prove" themselves to me by saying things like "Your dad is going to walk into your room right... right... NOW," and then my dad would walk in. So then I would start following what they said and it was just fucking crazy. I was pretty much schizophrenic.
They actually didn't stop until I became a Christian. I honestly think God made them stop, because the second I came to Christ in prayer (literally, the very second) the voices stopped and I never heard them again. I wasn't a believer before that, but I sure as hell was afterward. I had tried many things, seeing counselors, etc. and nothing worked.
Now, of course, that is nothing as far as tangible proof. That experience could be explained away as easily as it can be relied on. So, of course, there are different reasons as to why I remain a Christian.
As far reasons for remaining a man of faith, basically it has to do with the history of the Christian religion. I don't look to the actions of modern Christians, I look to the historical actions of Christ and the very first Christians. The Christian faith has as much historical support as most any event in history, as far as I can tell. One of the major reasons I say that is because I've never known any other group of men to give up their lives and die horrible, painful deaths for what they knew to be "fairy tales". Many skeptics claim the first Christians were just power hungry deceivers. That just can't be true, historically, as far as I'm concerned. The first disciples of Christ, history teaches us, were martyred for their faith and proclamation of personally witnessing Christ's resurrection.
I've known individual men who died for their own faith. For instance, Joseph Smith (founder of Mormonism) died for his faith. He had placed his faith in the vision he supposedly had from God (with no witnesses, just himself). Or Muhammad (founder of Islam) died practicing his faith. He had placed his faith in the vision he supposedly had from God (with no witness, just himself).
But then again, both those men had other likely motivations. For instance, both men used their religion to justify taking multiple wives (some very young), and both men profited by taking land and fighting other's for land. History shows the 12 disciples did not take multiple wives, they did not take land, they did not make a lot of money. These men had a passion for preaching the good news that Christ rose from the dead and that we can all have peace with God and eternal life. Period. That's it. They died for their faith, destitute (by earthly standards).
I've never known 12 men willing to die such horrible deaths for a known lie, especially when they had no sexual or financial motive. They weren't the only ones though. Hundreds were recorded as having witnessed the resurrection, and hundreds and thousands were martyred. Maybe all these people were tripping on LSD. Maybe history was re-written to blot out records of the disciples taking many wives and much land in conquest. But I don't see any evidence of that.
On top of that, I find the Christian Scriptures (the New Testament) to be a tremendous source of wisdom and guidance. Through them and through prayer God has done multiple things in my life on par with the "deliverance from the voices" that I don't have time to relate here. So basically, my experiences with God and my examination of history and the Scriptures (on my own, apart from Southern Baptist traditions) are what make me and keep me a Christian.
The way I see it, God knew I was going to be in this situation long before I was even born. He has a reason for allowing everything he allows on earth, and this situation with my marriage will work itself out for the best. I fully believe that. I've seen it in other rough things I've been through. That belief is strong in me. I know it is true. Perhaps my wife doesn't, and that may be why she is threatening suicide and all that bullshit. Who knows...
P.S. - I don't mean to bash any other faith's, especially Islam and Mormonism. But the fact is, we all have reasons we might choose one faith over another. I don't mean to judge anyone, but I just aim to relate the reasons I have chosen my particular faith.
Originally Posted by JohnnyZ
jsn9333 Reviewed by jsn9333 on . Told My Wife Yesterday That I Burn (Quick Background, for those of you who missed a post of mine earlier in the year: My wife and I were both "born and raised ultra-conservatives" who got married a couple years ago. We didn't sleep with each other before getting married, and have experienced a whole lot of sexual, intimacy, and emotional incompatibility. We make good friends, but horrible lovers. It's just been fucked up. But anyway, I subsequently became a bit more liberal and started to smoke pot, without telling her Rating: 5
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