Looking lustfully and admiring someone's beauty in a complimentary way are not necessarily the same thing. Telling her she has a nice rack would probably make her uncomfortable from the sounds of it, but saying 'dear, you look lovely this morning' in a non-sexual situation, like when you are on your way to work and kissing her goodbye, might help her get used to being seen as beautiful, if that is something that she has insecurities about.

So often it is our insecurities that cause problems with relationships, especially romantic ones, rather than actual events or issues- she needs something to make her self-worth go up, that has NOTHING to do with you- like an academic accomplishment or a position of authority at work or even winning the annual chili cook-off. As I said before, it sounds as if she clings to you for approval and really a whole outlook on reality, if finding out things about you that are not actually that serious in the big scheme of things would shake her so badly. Looking at pr0n on teh intertubez= eww, but not worth freaking about. Gambling away your joint checking account= worth freaking out about. Smoking pot= worrisome to many, but not the end of the world. Acquiring any of a number of physical addictions that change you permanently and cause financial hardship or behaviour changes= Worth freaking about. The porn thing is totally related to her self image. If my man had a stack of Playboy on the back of the crapper, who cares! He still comes to bed with me at night, right? If someone relaxes with weed, that's their thing that they do. I'd rather be involved with a pothead than, say, a scratch-ticket addict. REALLY!

Chicklet needs a hobby for her confidence, and a real-life circle of friends that includes some diversity. It takes ALL of us to make the world go around! Being very sheltered has made her who she is, and it is scary to come out of your comfort zone and blink at the light of a new day. If you are close emotionally, you can make her feel protected while she chews the whole thing over.