My wife doesn't know I use cannabis.

[lilpayaso13]

mmmm, i read every bit of that. If now you are unhappy with your marrage with her and marijuana makes you feel better about everything, Just get it over with and tell her. If she takes it bad and leaves you, then what have you to lose? Maybe you would be happier alone and with weed. I beleive everyone out there has a match that is perfect for them and has that perfect chemistry. You have said from day 1, there has been problems in your marrage then maybe its for the best that you find that "special someone". So if she chooses the choice that your so afraid about... and leaves you because of the marijuana, So be it. One day you could find the girl that is perfect for you and accepts you for who you are.
I hope that your outcome of this comes out the way you want it. Peace out my fellow weed smoker :stoned:

[Coelho]

Man... thats a tough situation... i dont know what to say about it...

Anyway... i have a comment on Grannys post... if your wife is such radical Christian like you said, it would be wiser not to show her the things about the Bible, Jesus and Cannabis, cause very probably she would take it as a heresy, a blasphemy, and it would only worsen your situation.
I think it would be far surer only show her the medical cannabis uses... cause they are science-proven facts, and would not be challenging her religious views.

And good luck! :thumbsup:

[RobPA]

You are in a rough situation bud! I was engaged to someone for 5 years who dident like the fact that I smoked pot and always gave me shit for it, but when she wanted to smoke it on vacation or randomly everything was O.K. You are who you are, and if the pot is not impacting you-or your marriage in a negative way then I do not see the problem. But tell her the truth ASAP, TRUST ME, lieing about it and not telling is a very very fine line and I never got anywhere by lieing about it. Tell her, I went to a very strict adventist school for most of my life when I was younger and I understand what you mean about the christtian girl thing and the whole stereotype. Good luck and BE HONEST! tell her!

[StickyfingahZ]

can I ask what church you go to bro.
Did your church recommend counseling?

[birdgirl73]

That's a tough situation, JSN9333. I admire you for wanting to be honest and open and above board with her.

I was trying to put myself in your place w/ her. I think if I were in that situation, I might try broaching the subject within the bounds of a counseling session, perhaps, since y'all are already going. I'd also make sure I said, up front and before you break the fact of your smoking to her, that you have been worried to death about telling her and fear that she may use this as a reason to leave you. That's a way of pre-empting and relieving some of the pressure of that topic up front, which is often a good negotiation tactic.

Another question occurred to me, and I hesitate to ask this but it's worth considering. Are you by any chance bound and determined to tell her now within the next two or three days because on some level--maybe not consciously but down underneath someplace--you're really hoping that this will provoke a falling out and potential separation? Just something to consider about your timing and feeling that this has to be done now.

I certainly wish you the best of luck.

[FreshNugz]

I think it would be far surer only show her the medical cannabis uses... cause they are science-proven facts, and would not be challenging her religious views.

science proven facts are the biggest challenge to religious views. For example, evolution. I'd have to agree with Granny here. I think showing her a connection between MJ and the bible will help her to try and embrace the idea.

Good luck dude.

PS. And just from a girl's perspective...we've all had that fight where the man neglects to tell us something because he is convinced that we will flip out on him. Most times women just appreciate the honesty...by not telling her because she will flip out, you're actually worsening the problem because you didn't give her a chance to react, and just presumed how she would. Even if she's mad at what you said, she will be more forgiving because you were honest..trust me. This is a common relationship issue...of course people are different, but this situation is one everyone can relate to I think.

[L Rag]

I just gotta say man, I'm feeling the love haha. It's primo that someone can talk about their problems and get such a big response from so many people, this is what its about maaaan... peace :jointsmile:

[8182KSKUSH]

Thank god you don't have any kids, don't have kids. Good luck.

[jessem98]

Honestly? Leave her. You two are not getting along, with "serious problems from day 1". This is very bad in my opinion. If you're going to spend the rest of your life (let me remind you, theres no second life) with a person, you better damn well know that you love her, you can be honest with her, and above all co-exist with her. These things should come naturally, and will, when you meet the person you are destined to be with. I had an old chinese lady tell me something at work which was - you know the love of your life when you would die for that person, they may not feel the same way about you (god forbid) but at least they are happy. I think you sound awesome, very moral oriented, and i respect that which is why it bothers me to read that you are thinking of staying with this person. Take this or leave it, I am just saying what id be thinking and doing if i were in your shoes. Also, (im going to guess) half the reason you wed was because of the sex issue. Being in a relationship and/or finding that one person for you is a serious matter, and to me (off of what i read) you really need to sit down, think about what you want out of your spouse, and see how she lines up. I mean no ones PERFECT, but it sounds like shes kinda far off of what you are looking for.

[Coelho]

science proven facts are the biggest challenge to religious views. For example, evolution. I'd have to agree with Granny here. I think showing her a connection between MJ and the bible will help her to try and embrace the idea.

Well... i said that from my own experience... i was born and rised in a very conservative Christian family, and so i know how it feels to be one of them, and i know how touchy they can get in matters of religion.
If someone said me that cannabis has several medical uses, i wouldnt care much about this, from a religious viewpoint.
But if someone said Jesus used to smoke cannabis, i SURELY would be pissed of hear such blasphemy... and wouldnt want to hear anymore about this.
Also, i actually tried this "biblical" approach to convince someone i know (who also smokes and is a Christian) that smoking is not wrong, but when he heard about this he behaved like if i had said a heresy... so i know what im saying when i say to NOT use this approach with ultra-conservative Christians.
And what i meant with scientifically proven is that the medical uses of cannabis are FAR more proven than the "theories" (i would say wishful thinkings) about Jesus smoking weed and such, and thus harder to be questioned and/or disbelieved.