Don't worry, P4B! We're filling up fast, but I'll try to save a spot for you!

I hear the sinking of the mighty Republican was an even more epic nightmare of the sea than the Indianapolis! The ship listing to one side and taking on water fast! The desperate party members already in the freezing ocean, screaming and wailing like terriified children! And crazy old Cap'n McCain yelling, "Bail! Bail! Bail, you fools! Bail for a hundred years if that's what it takes!"

And every time you think he's going to throw you a life preserver, it turns out to be a bowling ball! "Here, cling to this! War! Debt! Recession!"

And then McCain's in the water too and climbing on your back as you desparately thrash to keep your head above the waves! "Get off me, old man! You'll pull us both down! Bublblblblblblblblblblblble........"

Oh, the humanity!

Thank God we were able to save a few of the poor wretches...