Dude i think a lot like you. I've done all the drugs that you listed plus acid, shrooms, ecstacy, and meth. My perception of reality is so distorted and i realize this, buts its as if i've completley forgotten what my reality once was. I am also a strong athiest and i see no real meaning in life, because no matter how much I achieve here on earth, it is completley meaningless to the rest of the universe and will all be lost someday anyway. Its like I see things as they really. For instance, i dont see a car as a car anymore, i now see it is as a meaningless arrangement of metal and rubber that we use for transportation. I feel this way about everything, its like now i see everythign to be the sum of its parts which for soem reason has my mind convinced that it is meaningless. Once i start to think this way it is impossible to convince my mind otherwise, its unshakable. other people dont even seem to exist anymopre, its like im in my own world, everyone else is just an illusion. I dont know if this shit is from teh drugs or what but i fuckin hate it.