Yeah, I have that same problem too. Exact same, old guy from high school too.

What I noticed was that, he was really my first love, and I won't stop loving him, I'm just not in love with him. Does that make sense? I'll always remember how happy he made me, but I don't let him run my life anymore.

I think it's more of a pyschological thing, that you think you can be more than friends. You want to be, but logically, it didn't work for a reason. It's just the battle between heart and mind.

You don't want to see him again because you want it to be completely over, but you need to see him for closure.