Eh, you gotta meet her halfway, and she needs to do the same. A bit of sacrifice is required. It would be best at the time to try to observe why she gets spazzy in those moments. You'd have an idea what to do NOT to cause it, and solve the problem. Also labeling what you are doing, ex. when you want to read a book while watching TV, just tell her what you are doing, and reassure her that doing so isn't a cause for not loving her.