Quote Originally Posted by sawleaf
I understand what you are saying. That's one of the great things about cannabis, you can view your life and be content and happy with what you have. You shouldn't really care what other's think. What's important is what you think about yourself. I don't see pre-marital sex or smoking cannabis as wrong, but everyone is different. It's acceptance that is harder. We are quick to convince ourselves that our opinions are right and others are wrong. Who are others to judge you???
Well, kids blame everything I do wrong on drugs. I'm not smart anymore supposedly? (Which I still believe I am, or well, I'm not any dumber, just more mature now). Now my math teacher knows I do drugs, which isn't a good thing. He's the head of the math team, and I have him for my math class. 2 out of my 7 classes I have are with him, I had him last year, and will have him every year until I'm a senior. He kind of played it off though... but it's still not good for him to know. I'm afraid they'll phone my parents or something, but I don't want to have to deal with the humiliation, or possible expulsion. I'm in fear every class whenever words such as "stoned" comes around (not meaning getting stoned, but as the punishment, or situations like that), or in English when my cool teacher says "if you can't remember definitions of words like that, you need to stop smoking so much pot", and people will just yell out "Mike!" and then stare at me (in a jokingly manner). Right now we're reading One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest by Ken Kesey, and she's told us the author was an acid eater, and we have to do research on the Merry Pranksters and The Grateful Dead. I was reading a book called Acid Dreams, which was obviously about LSD, so people think I've done that (which I haven't, YET). I believe in the use of entheogens, and think the best cure for alcoholism is LSD (such as Hubbard's experiments, if my mind serves me correctly). And being a morally concious student, I MUST graduate highschool with honors, go to college, and not end up a loser like my two half brothers, who one is dead because of heroin, and both dropped out at an early, early age (middle school and highschool). If I were to get kicked out of school, I'd feel like I'm a failure, when I've done nothing wrong, and get in trouble because of the twisted truth. Pulling a Columbine, suicide (I know it sounds terrible, since my half brother killed himself due to his heroin addiction), or just beating the fuck out of people out of school are my only choices of what I could do if I did get expelled, (or to prevent the talk, just the fighting part I mean). I just want to leave class sometimes when shit like that happens, and maybe just run away and not return home. If I'm tested positive for drugs, I may lose all my federal level scholarships, which would pay at least 75% of my tuition, and my chances to get into college are lessened. If trying to be morally concious would cause all this trouble, what's the difference between being a good kid and a bad kid?