Two married blokes are out drinking one night. "i just dont know what else to do" says one to the other. "whenever i go home after w`ve been out drinking, i turn the headlights off before i get to the driveway, i shut off the engine and coast into the garage, i take my shoes off before i go in to the house, i sneak up the stairs, i get undressed in the bedroom, i ease into bed and my wife still wakes up and shouts "and what time do you call this ?"

His mate looks at him and says "well your obviously taking the wrong approach. I screach into the driveway, slam the door, storm up the steps, throw my shoes into the closet, jump into bed, rub my hands on my wifes arse and say, "how about a blowjob ? and she`s always sounds asleep."