I agree with Geo's comment that she's going to have a lifetime of bad relationships, most likely, and with Lip's comment that she's selfish.

Real love in a healthy relationship feels good. It doesn't yank your chain. Manipulate. Act like a bitch to push you away and then, when you're far enough out, reel you back in. Your thread title says it all. The strong feelings you've got for her are more an expression of what's up with you. By that, I mean you've gotten yourself emotionally invested in someone who's mean and nasty because, on some level, you don't think you deserve better. One way you can test that is by considering young ladies you know who're a lot nicer and more loving. If the nice ones don't appeal to you, that's because you don't like yourself enough to feel like you merit respect, friendliness and steady, even-handed affection. You do deserve it, though. All people do.

You sound like you've got your utility knife out and are starting to realize you need to make a cut. Make it clean and quick and lasting. (I'm speaking metaphorically here. Don't give her an actual knife wound, for heaven's sake.) Then get out and start fishing for someone nicer and prettier. Good luck!

Just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan . . .