Quote Originally Posted by Hilder420
I just dont know what hes gonna think or say.. He is or was a runner, when i told him i had an abortion without telling him first he didnt speak to me for a year. I dont expect him to run away this time, but im afraid he will see me as damaged and maybe feel sorry for me. I dont want pity from anyone. .
I'm sure the reason he was upset about the abortion was that he was personally involved in the circumstances leading up to that. This is very very different. TELL him you don't want pity, TELL him that you don't want him to see you as damaged- that you've HEALED and telling him is the final part of the process of becoming whole again.

I moved this back into the general sexuality area because this isn't a woman's issue, this is an issue that men and women BOTH have to deal with; men get sexually abused as well, and they and their partners have to go through this too.

Stay strong Hilder, you're doing the right thing, and I hope that talking about it here is good practice for what you are going to say to him.