To me it sounds like you are a typical "nice guy" who got fucked over. Yes, she was your friend, but she probably never even entertained the idea of thinking of you as a bf.

It also sounds like you don't know what you want. You don't know if you just want her back as a friend or you want her as a gf.

Either way, my advice is "grow some balls," then she'll respect you.

And if you havn't got into a fight in 3 years, that's bad. It sounds like you don't express your wants, needs, and feelings. A one-way friendship/relationship is not a good one.