Ok this is my fault for not clarifying. But on the bright side I took a rediculous amount of painkillers and I'm alright again... and numb and stoned all to hell. I wrote that letter about 3 weeks ago, I apologized 4 days after, and only yesterday she wrote me back saying I ruined our friendship. So she had 3 weeks and no, time didn't heal all wounds.

I know you all say she'd forgive me "if she's a real friend" but I was a hardcore bastard, completely outside of my normal personality. I mean I can't even talk to most people, yet the first day I met her we talked so easily. She was always nice to me and I was always as nice as I could be to her and in 3 years we never had a fight. She always understood me, always accomodated my social ineptitude without judgement, I loved every moment with her. I just can't understand how we've had so many experiences together and talked about so many intimate things, and she won't even forgive me just this once. This is the only time I've done anything to her.

I don't have any delusions about anything happening between us, I honestly just want my friend back. I've never had a friend as good as her and I don't even have any friends in town as it is. I still can't believe I threw it away.

(PS. the presentation got delayed till next Monday)