I think we should delete this thread. I was reading the newspaper just now, and when I assigned a number to each letter in the alphabet, 1 - 26, then took the third letter from each 3+ letter word in the article I was reading, added 1 to it's numerical value, and translated back into alpha form, you wouldn't believe what it spelled:

Graphite Pen &amp Pencil Company: Custom Imprinted Pencils and Pens plus Bulk Pencils, Mechanical Pencils, Erasers, Stationery and more

They're going to silence us! THEY'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!