Ever been caught?

[irishAFRICAN]

sometimes when i wank it my cat comes up to me and stares so i splode all over him












joking....

























or am i?

Im reporting you to the RSPCA....imp:

[smoke it]

i jacked of on a roller coaster dis summer

[PaulCT7]

When I was in London with a school trip, I went out the window and tried to wank off on the roof top onto the streets below. But I was too drunk, and there were three dudes in the room behind me, and I couldnt get it up...

[dreadedben]

sometimes when i wank it my cat comes up to me and stares so i splode all over him












joking....

























or am i?

Joking or not, that is funny shit

[Delta9 UK]

Oh man this thread is teh funneh :thumbsup:

OK first time "caught" - at the time this was pretty bad...

I was 11 and going on holiday to Australia. The flight was landing en-route for fuel but it was pretty much a 23 hr journey.

So I waited until there was no-one waiting for the toilet and figured what the hell? Looking back I sort of joined the one-man mile high club

So I get into the toilet/cubicle and I have this picture I "borrowed" from some guys paper - (For the brits Page 3 or something similar) - basically a topless girl (hey I was 11!) and I manage to stick it to the mirror in there so I can get going.

So I pulled down my jeans and manage to get my balls over the sink (I'm having to stand on tip-toe) and I'm really going for it. I start pulling away.

36,000 feet speeding through the sky.

My mum gets worried easily.
She alerts an air stewardess.
Air stewardess knocks on the toilet door and asks if I'm "OK?"

I'm more than OK, to be fair she was really fit and I'm about to bust a nut - problem is I'm that far gone that I don't even answer.

My mum is right behind her.

At this point it gets tricky - pretty much the same time that I'm giving the sink a one man mayo makeover the door opens behind me.

Now this is doubly fucked up because I'm looking right into the mirror so I see both the look on my mums face and the stewardess.

I hadn't locked the door properly - it hadn't caught

Thankfully the stewardess shut the door but she was smiling - my mum was just all "shock and awe" you could tell she was thinking a hundred things at once - none of them good.

So I left quickly and sat back down trying to ignore my mum and talk to my dad who clearly didn't know :rasta:

I was just about calmed down and had stopped shitting myself when the stewardess appeared at my side and passed me a folded up bit of newspaper and just smiled.

I had of course left the picture of the topless page 3 "stunner" pinned up on the mirror after my hasty wank-retreat.

Doh!

But this was when British Airways meant you always got 110%

[irishAFRICAN]

Oh man this thread is teh funneh :thumbsup:

OK first time "caught" - at the time this was pretty bad...

I was 11 and going on holiday to Australia. The flight was landing en-route for fuel but it was pretty much a 23 hr journey.

So I waited until there was no-one waiting for the toilet and figured what the hell? Looking back I sort of joined the one-man mile high club

So I get into the toilet/cubicle and I have this picture I "borrowed" from some guys paper - (For the brits Page 3 or something similar) - basically a topless girl (hey I was 11!) and I manage to stick it to the mirror in there so I can get going.

So I pulled down my jeans and manage to get my balls over the sink (I'm having to stand on tip-toe) and I'm really going for it. I start pulling away.

36,000 feet speeding through the sky.

My mum gets worried easily.
She alerts an air stewardess.
Air stewardess knocks on the toilet door and asks if I'm "OK?"

I'm more than OK, to be fair she was really fit and I'm about to bust a nut - problem is I'm that far gone that I don't even answer.

My mum is right behind her.

At this point it gets tricky - pretty much the same time that I'm giving the sink a one man mayo makeover the door opens behind me.

Now this is doubly fucked up because I'm looking right into the mirror so I see both the look on my mums face and the stewardess.

I hadn't locked the door properly - it hadn't caught

Thankfully the stewardess shut the door but she was smiling - my mum was just all "shock and awe" you could tell she was thinking a hundred things at once - none of them good.

So I left quickly and sat back down trying to ignore my mum and talk to my dad who clearly didn't know :rasta:

I was just about calmed down and had stopped shitting myself when the stewardess appeared at my side and passed me a folded up bit of newspaper and just smiled.

I had of course left the picture of the topless page 3 "stunner" pinned up on the mirror after my hasty wank-retreat.

Doh!

But this was when British Airways meant you always got 110%

if cannabis.com was handing out awards for the funniest post....ud win it hands down breadren...:thumbsup:

[smitty420]

haha seriosuly that made me laugh, awesome story

[orangeman]

1) No

2) In the mirror

[GreenKing11]

I've never been caught. But the wierdest places are school, and jail, lol.

[MbanjeBoy]

weird how being caught wanking is somehow worse than being caught having sex. I guess it's cuz you got to shoulder all the blame and embarassment yourself when you're alone.... I've been caught a span of times, but only by my mates and a few times by my brothers. Never by my parents, thank God!

As to the weirdest, ummm... shit, I don't know... In a jacuuzi, in the sea (yeah, I know... just when you thought it was safe to go into the water.....I'm sorry!) plane toilets, train toilets, school toilets, my office, outdoors in the jungle (Africa), Jeezlaik! Where haven't I done it!

I blame it on being overly sexed and going to a private all boys school as a kid!