PB, just read through the thread, and like most, I agree, you did the right thing. I don't think that your delivery was bad, and you're dealing with the after shocks pretty well - not responding to his cries. That's normal, some people who get too attached have a hard time letting go. From the sounds of his situation as you've described it, he sounds like he's going to continue to be clingy.

I'm not sure how stable he is - it is normal to worry about someone getting too depressed and doing something drastic, such as suicide, but it doesn't usually get to that. However, if it were me - I'd prefer someone telling me exactly what didn't mesh with the relationship. Looking back on my own life (I'm 40 now and happily married), the one thing I would have appreciated knowing over the years was - what didn't work.

Sometimes we trip up and get too clingy; or we're not attentive enough; or are too unmotivated to find our paths in life. Between 18-30, I think a lot of people are just trying to find that comfortable balance. A lot of people, as he sounds like - still being a virgin, aren't familar with how to control their emotions just yet. Then, you through in some hormones, and you think any woman that can make you feel the way you do during sex, must be someone you should 'love'. Then you realize things like living with someone and sharing interests are whole other games.

Unless his mother is out of touch with her own maturing, I can't see how she would be anything but understanding about the whole thing. These things happen. At 20 (presumming you're both about that age) you have so many more people to date, to find out about what you want. From some of your comments, you seem to at least know you want someone ready to look ahead to the next phase of their life - adulthood. She will understandably be protective of her son, but hopefully she's realistic.

He'll get over it. What you leave him with, will determine whether he learns from it, and improves on the next one. If you truly care for him, I would think that you want to help him learn. Ok, so it didn't work with you two, but if you want him to be happy - this is a good way to help that happen.

Now, with you - three people with issues (2 fixer upppers, and this clingy one) - you have to question yourself - do you have a magnet for needy/clingy people? I did for a while. You believe you can fix them, or help them. You can't - people can only fix themselves, based on their mistakes.