from personal experiance.........married a guy 13 years older at 25, divorced him at 30. dated a 22 year old at 31 (way to young), made a pact with myself never to date or marry anyone five years younger or older, keep it in the same generation so to speak. Think dude, you are 30...she is 43, ( i did the math when i married the first time, didnt seem a big deal)..............you are 40 and she is 53..........that is if you make it that far, you still want sex and she is going thru menopause, hot flashes and all......and on top of all of it....she has not been dating and trusting in a long time you say........THAT in it's self is a huge huge SIGN, she can not commit, and that sounds like what you want from her.

MY advise, dont date anyone over five years older or younger, and run from them if they have had four or more marriages......and if they have commitment issues....know heartache is in your future, guard yourself. You are still young enough to save yourself, dont stop loving, just be careful. oh and i forgot....stay away from crazy ...crazy is exciting and will put you in a ditch.