Quote Originally Posted by FreshNugz
bahahahha I love that entire movie...but the best is when they are eating in the restaurant with the stolen monkey..and the cops come.

"This is the Utah State police! Jay and Silent Bob, we know you are inside. Step outside, and surrender the orangutang."
"Think they're talking about us??"

"Jay and Silent Bob...your C.L.I.T. doesn't stand a chance! Anyone not harbouring a fugitive monkey in there should hit the deck...we are going to open fire"
"Do not shoot! Don't shoot! We're just trying to take our son out of this hostile environment"
"Their son??...maybe they're one of those gay couples? (says it into magaphone)

"Uh yea, we're gay! And this is our adopted love child! We're not from around here. Don't make us go back to our liberal city home with tales of prejudice and bigotry within the heart of Utah!"
"Oh that's just what we need. A bunch of uppity homosexuals shooting their mouths off to the liberal media that the federal wildlife office persecutes gays!"
"Are you fucking crazy!!!??? Now they may be gay, but thats not their son, thats the APE!!"
"I think I would recognize an ape if I saw one, okay? The only thing I do recognize here is a political fiasco which I'm going to avoid by letting this buttfucking brady bunch go!!"
"You are free to leave, sirs. Please accept my apologies for detaining you and your unorthodox, but constitutionally protected family unit!
"Un-fucking-believeable"
"Might I add that's one fine looking child you have there"
"Hell yea, It's from this hot bitch who I fuck on the side, so as not to be all the way gay...but my tubby husband here, he's 100 percent gay...he LOVES THE COCK!"

*they leave*

"Well it's not my way, but I'll be damned if there doesnt go one happy family. Alright gang, lets just shoot some teargas into the diner, and when they come out with the monkey.....FUCKBEANS that was them wasn't it!!!"


LMFAO!!!!

I know that was long, but definitely one of the best parts!!!
THAT WAS A GOOD LAUGH