Thanks for your replies everyone, I don't know what I was expecting posting this, whether I was looking for advice or just wanted to vent some of the confusing thoughts I've had but I'm glad I did.


Quote Originally Posted by Weedhound
Another good thought....your dates don't even get to open their mouths and already you're making judgments about what they think while playing the same game yourself by not stating what you mean and bs'ing around yourself.
I hadn't looked at it this way (even though subconciously I know that's what I'm doing), and it's helped me realise that a lot of this is in my head and as other's have suggested I should just 'step up to the plate'.

In some ways I feel I have stepped up to the plate in trying to initiate some kind of contact outside of work, since she see asked me first it made me quite confident about it all but now I'm more confused than ever.

I was casually texting her last night and just told her that 'i'll leave it up to you if you want to do anything this week just let me know'. She replied earlier today saying can we do it next week cus she's a bit 'spent out' whatever that means lol, so I'm pretty much just gonna cool things now cus it doesn't seem like she's interested based on that (im sure she could find time if she wanted to see me).

I havn't replied yet, I don't know whether to make some joke like 'sure 'next week' lol' (there is sarcasm there if you couldn't tell) or whether to take it more seriously and just say to her its fine if she doesn't want to do anything I just want the truth as opposed to empty promises etc..

I thank anyone who's managed to read all my self-obsessed, adolescent drivel about this and any advice is always welcome still. This girl is a great laugh and I'd be happy to be friends in all honesty, maybe I'm already in the friend zone which would be fine but then why would she not want to go catch a movie or something.

Time for me to chilax and to stop thinking about this for a bit I think. :jointsmile: