Don't think it would be like this if I were a guy.

[GraziLovesMary]

Mm, I have to agree that I prefer to light my own bowl, cause I'm a big girl and I know how to handle a lighter. Also, I notice that whenever a guy lights the bowl for me, he pulls back as soon as he lights a tiny bit of the bud, assuming I won't be able to take a larger hit. It gets annoying after a while, especially if it's your weed, cause then you're just passing around your goodies and barely getting any off it.

I've smoked with plenty of guys that assumed I couldn't take as "fat" a rip as them, but I ended up proving them horribly wrong. First, they would hand me the piece and ask, "You want me to hold it for you? You know where the carb is right? You want me to light it for you?" And sure, first I'll act like a nice little girl and let them have their fun in generalizing me, but after that first rotation, a big girl has to be let out and have her way. And after that first rotation, some eyes widen up on those boys' faces and acceptance spreads.

But I do understand where the chivalry comes in, like when I'm with my boyfriend and he lights it for me, not because he isn't aware that I can compete, but because.. Well, I don't know, why do guys like to light the bowl for girls anyway? I'm guessing it doesn't have to do with sexual appeal at all....

Hmmm... see thats where I think misunderstanding is coming to play. If Im not mistaken hes not pulling the lighter away because he doesnt think you can take a big hit... most likely its because he knows that the heat from an open flame destroys about 50% of the THC on contact. The key is to take long slow tokes and let the cherry do the work, as the cherry is nowhere near as hot as a flame. Cover the opening of the bowl with your hand to restrict the volume of air going in(which increases the velocity) and take shorter puffs to encourage the growth of the cherry. I can get a monstrously enormous hit like this and I get much higher because I used barely any flame, and more of that beautiful Delta-9 TetraHydraCannabinol makes it to my lungs undamaged.

[ScaryMissMary]

You've got to be kidding? Right? That means to me that women 'must' change how they feel about themselves, in order to pamper that oh so fragile male ego. Bullshit!

If I become condescending and patronizing with guys, most will certainly take offense, and rightly so: then go off and stew in some childish snit rather then express themselves about what might possibly be bothering them. Oh yeah, they go into their 'cave'. You see guys, most women will face the issue, discuss it, and then move on. It's not about agree or disagree, it's all in the process. And before you think I'm some bull dyke feminest, well it ain't so. I happen to like you guys around, as long as you can be house trained. lol

Gender has not one iota to do with being offensive. If men would simply be more submissive, learn to establish a repore*, and not get so freaked if another guys gives'em a huge, it would be such a lovely place to live...B

:thumbsup: Preach on, sister!

[LuckyG]

Hmmm... see thats where I think misunderstanding is coming to play. If Im not mistaken hes not pulling the lighter away because he doesnt think you can take a big hit... most likely its because he knows that the heat from an open flame destroys about 50% of the THC on contact. The key is to take long slow tokes and let the cherry do the work, as the cherry is nowhere near as hot as a flame. Cover the opening of the bowl with your hand to restrict the volume of air going in(which increases the velocity) and take shorter puffs to encourage the growth of the cherry. I can get a monstrously enormous hit like this and I get much higher because I used barely any flame, and more of that beautiful Delta-9 TetraHydraCannabinol makes it to my lungs undamaged.

I need to show this post to some of the people I've smoked with. They think I'm taking wussy hits because I'm not letting the flame touch the weed, letting it cherry when it does light on fire... I'm just getting more bang for my buck, that's all! It's like the poor man's vape. I know I got a good hit when I drag for fifteen seconds and there's barely any smoke when I exhale. I don't need to prove how "hardcore" I am by roasting the whole bowl in one go and coughing my lungs out.

[JD1stTimer]

Grazi you're right it ticks me off so bad, the first person I ever seriously smoked with liked to really rip up the bowl with her flame, and she would yell "Cached!" when there was still a ball of resin that was cherry in my opinion (Still red, still giving me smoke). Then she would make fun of me for how high I was and I was a lightweight, and at the time I thought it was true but now I know.. when I was rescuing her cherry and not flaming the bowl again I was actually getting more THC. :thumbsup:

[lagstronaut]

If you're offended, tell them to stop.

But honestly, in a world where all people do is complain about how shitty everyone else is, your natural instinct inside is to feel resentment towards those who would like to give you a helping hand? Odd.

[DarkHairedSativa]

Ato answer the original question... sorry girl, I'm not quite sure how it's happening,but it's never been an issue for me.I usually have a group of people around when we're smoking so.....whoever owns the pot loads the bowl...we all share cuz we don't always have it at the same time.It's nothing that's ever come up.i don't help myself to someone else's weed.If I have the bag and don't feel like loading it,I'll ask someone to do it.Just kinda a stoner's ettiquette thing.I've also been asked to load by other people.You can tell whoever politely "no I got this Thanks" and smile. But keep the look in your eyes that says "Don't touch my weed Jackass!!!" LOL

[SaanenGoats]

Hmmm... I dunno if CannabisHappiness is still around... I noticed she hasn't posted anything since the original post back in July but I think I'll still throw my two cents in because after reading everyone's responses, I'm still of a slightly differing opinion than everyone else, though I think thecreator is pretty damn close to my stance. I like what he said, he seems a person I would like to know.

To CannabisHappiness, I get similar vibes often too, the 'this would be different if I had a dick' thing, and I've doubted myself so often... thought I was just being supersensitive, overly antagonistical, etc... but I've learned to trust my instincts. It really is the old 'help the helpless flower' thing as thecreator put it that puts my defenses up. Two guys can each hold a door for me, and I'll accept it as a friendly and courteous gesture similar to how I'd hold a door for a girlfriend from one, and from the other I'd take it as a condescending, old-fashioned (in a bad sense) gesture stemming from the belief that women need to be taken care of and coddled and so forth.

So the short answer would be a resounding yes, sometimes I do get the feeling that it would be different if I were a guy, and you know what, it's not just a feeling. There are men out there who do treat women with less than equal respect. So to CannabisHappiness if she's still floating out there: Trust yourself. Some men will never realize that you're not some shrinking wallflower and what's more, it's not a man thing. There will be women in life that don't respect you either. Us women have a responsibility to be more equality based too and try to refrain from passing off a male asshole as just 'another dick'; if we generalize patronizing men as being representative of their entire sex than we are being no better than men who generalize all women by one fluffy-brained, golden-haired female. All things in moderation though: there are genderless assholes but there are also men who truly disrespect women, and such men I personally have zero respect, tolerance, or time for.

[Huntor]

the true gentleman is still alive ! and i think its fitting that it was taught to me by my mum.i respect anyone regardless of gender.
iv taught my g/f how to smoke and i love seeing her learn,but i wont act as if she is incapable of doing things herself.there is a difference between showing someone and telling someone because you think they cant learn it.

[blackbarbie]

i'm not offended by stuff like that at all. i love gentlemen. if a guy wants to do a task for me, i don't look at it like he's doing it b/c i'm an incapable inferior female, i look at it like he's doing it to be nice. he doesn't have to roll my j for me but he's doing it anyway.

[palerider7777]

....humm never happy i say never it's always something..oh well