I am kind of in the exact situation.
My father is a Vietnam Vet and has the exact same attitude about me staying out and getting angry at simple stuff.

You do gotta give him slack becasue he is used to that way of life being in the Army and War. It is VERY hard for them to show their feelings so this is a kind of way for them to express it. Its like the only way they know how.
What I always do now that normally cools stuff off is instead of getting into an argument, say something goofy that will lighten the experience. Being around him I love arguing(lol). I make it into kind of a game where you are arguing but at the same time joking.

Dont go getting all mushy on him either. Hell automatically block anything coming out of your mouth. You also have to show that you are a man are in control of your life. Hell still bitch but as time goes on it will get better